This is my weekly series for subscribers only, where I’ll share things that caught my eye this week in a fun and flirty way (kiss), a sustainable way (marry), or a not-so-good way (kill). And yes, this trendy game is technically “f***, marry, or kill” but we run a family-friendly-ish show around here.

Kiss (things I like right now)

📕 The Joe Ledger Series by Jonathan Maberry (←listened with my ears)

Remember a few summers back, when I listened to the entire Jack Carr The Terminal List series, narrated by the inimitable Ray Porter? I listened non-stop for months, two summers in a row, to the point where I couldn’t tolerate anyone but Porter in my ears.

Over the winter, I discovered another series narrated by Porter, in a very similar vein. Joe Ledger is an agent with the DMS (Department of Military Sciences), a clandestine government organization fighting some weird-ass threats to national security. Zombies, vampires, aliens… they exist not in a horror/science fiction way, but in a “the science behind these encounters is horrifying and also probably real somewhere” kind of way.

Ledger is similar to Reese in that he’s the baddest of the bad-asses. However, he’s got a fantastic sense of humor, an equally impressive and endearing team, and stories just out there enough to keep me enraptured. And, of course, RAY PORTER.

The series has full books interspersed with short novellas that embellish on the stories. The novellas aren’t available on audiobook, so I skipped them and just listened to the full books. The books are long, too—14 to 18 hours—which I loved. Plus I found many of them on Hoopla and Libby, letting me listen for free.

See the books in order here, and start with Patient Zero—which sucked me in SO hard.

Get weird with the DMS

🧳 Compression cubes that actually compress

When I bought my Monos suitcases (which I love, but did not use on this trip), I also bought their coordinated packing cubes. When I was practice-packing for Switzerland, I was struggling. I practically passed out trying to fully compress them, and most of the time one side of the cube just wouldn’t zip. I was super frustrated because I had my packing list down and didn’t want to compromise.

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I’ve been in Switzerland for a week now, hiking with my sister. (I’ll be sharing my entire itinerary, including where we stayed, the hikes we did, the sights we saw, and everything I packed, when I get home!)

While it’s a big country and we’re only seeing one small corner, there has been a learning curve (steep at times) in adopting to Swiss hiking norms, travels, and culture. Here are ten things I didn’t know—but really wish I had—before arriving.

1. Things open late, and close early

This was the wildest flex for me, considering I’m such an early bird. At home I’m leaving for hikes at 6 AM. I was shocked to discover the gondola from Wengen to Männlichen didn’t start running until 8:30 AM. Like, your day is half over by then? Even in peak summer, the earliest ride up is 8:10 AM, and the latest ride back down at any time of year is 5:30 PM. We also missed a bus in Kandersteg because the last bus left at 4:15 PM.

However, we quickly realized Swiss tourists are far more relaxed than hikers in Utah. We started our hikes around 9:00 AM, and trails didn’t get “busy” until closer to noon. Still, starting so late means you’re almost always hiking in full sun, start to finish. That part was brutal, and I was frustrated once or twice that I was awake at 6 AM (as usual) with nowhere to go for two-plus hours.

Also, in Wengen, the coffee shop didn’t open until 7:30 AM. In Grindewald, the first two coffee shops I searched for didn’t open until 9 AM. This was equally wild to me. Many stores and shops also closed by dinnertime, though the sun didn’t set until 9:30 PM.

2. You’ll commute to hikes

I am spoiled in SLC, where I am on the trails in 20-30 minutes. Here, however, we had to take trains and/or cable cars just to get to the trailhead. On our second day of hiking, we took three trains to Grindewald, then a cable car up to the trailhead. Some commutes were an hour-plus, but the views are so stunning you won’t mind the travel time.

One thing that’s nice about Swiss hiking trails is that you can often start at the top, and hike your way down the trail. We didn’t do this, but it does make for some easier hiking in many areas.

3. You can easily hike point-to-point

We didn’t do a single out-and-back hike our entire trip, which was a welcome change. There are plenty of loops, but we mostly did point-to-point. We’d start from home, commute to the trailhead, then hike in one direction (up, or up then down) until we were done. You’ll end at a different town or city, then take a train and/or bus home. (We did some recon ahead of time, so I knew our options and bus or train stops along the way.)

4. Do not gamble with train tickets

Half the time, nobody checked our ticket on the bus or train. It seems to be random, where conductors will visit some cars but not others. However, they can charge a steep penalty if you get on the train without a ticket. We learned this the hard way on our post-hike ride from Kleine Scheidegg to Wengen. We foolishly didn’t buy a ticket at the station. When the conductor realized we were ticketless, he charged us $50 for a $16 train ride. We were already bleeding money, and it hurt.

5. Buy the Swiss Half-Fare Card

The Half-Fare card will cut the cost of train tickets (and most boat, bus, gondola, and cable car tickets) in half, and it’s 100% worth it. It’s good for a month, and costs 150 CHF (around 185 USD).

Make sure to choose the correct dates (starting the day you arrive) and remember they write dates backwards—day first, then month. This section is short because this is a must if you’re spending more than a few days in Switzerland.

6. Not all trails were open

Our trip was June 13 - June 22, which is still “early” in the season in some areas, given snow and risk of avalanche. While most of the trails we wanted to do were open, there were two popular trails that were closed—the Eiger Trail (there are a number of ways to access), and the Schynige Platte to First trail above Bachalpsee. We also encountered a few climbs in the snow above Bachalpsee, and some of the huts and restaurant stops along that trail were closed.

This wasn’t a big deal, although I would have loved to do the Eiger trail. We did bump into a family on one trail, however, who wasn’t as prepared for the elevation, wind, and cold. They were counting on a stop at the restaurant at the next juncture, but learned too late that it wasn’t open yet. It was likely a miserable climb back down.

7. Weather is unpredictable

I packed lots of layers for this trip: tank tops, light base layers, a light windbreaker, a packable puffy jacket, and a Gore-Tex rain jacket. Weather reports changed quickly, ranging from 45°F and rainy to 90°F and sunny and sunny depending on the elevation and location.

It was 30 degrees colder and far windier up at Lake Bachalpsee compared to the area we hiked the day before, and it hit 90°F in full sun in Thun. Afternoon thunderstorms are also common.

When it’s sunny, it’s hot AF. Sunscreen is a must—reapply often. A linen long-sleeve oversized shirt would have been so nice to have in town. (I had a light REI base layer that I threw on when I needed sun protection.) I also had a hat and sunglesses for sun protection.

8. The mental load can be intense

While most websites can be natively translated into English, the amount of recon I had to do was still exhausting. Researching areas to hike; seeing if routes were open; downloading the right trail maps; figuring out how to get there and back; buying train, bus, gondola, and boat tickets from the right stop and in the right direction… it’s much more work than hiking at home. Some trails are relatively simple, but we wanted more “off the beaten path” experiences, and it was a lot of work.

Today, we decided to continue our hike from Gemmi Pass to Leukerbad, instead of going back the way we came. It required taking a gondola, riding a bus, taking a train, catching another bus, then boarding another train to get home. (I did all of this from the trail; cell service is good just about everywhere.)

Restaurant menus were also a challenge. In Kandersteg, they’re almost all in German. ChatGPT came in handy for translating menus; I’d send it a photo and it would outline the choices in English.

9. The Swiss are… reserved

I thought East Coasters were direct—the Swiss take this to a whole new level. You’ll get one-word answers, zero small talk, matter-of-fact responses, and at times, terrible customer service. (We did not try to browse at Kathy’s.)

Early in the trip, I accidentally bought a train ticket for the wrong day. I smiled and tried to explain to the conductor. He gave me a blank stare, said, “But 17 is not 16,” then told me to pay. We were also met with many stony faces on the hiking trail when we said a simple, “hello.” Be prepared for this.

Direct, short, and reserved are just part of the culture here—and from what I have read, the Swiss find the outgoing, friendly, easily excited manner many Americans project insincere or even impolite. They are also big rule-followers, so don’t jaywalk, play music during quiet hours, or skirt over a “trail closed” sign.

10. There will be hills

After exploring many mountain towns, from Wengen to Spiez, Thun, and Leukerbad, our quads and calves were fried. Yes, we did some intense hikes, but we probably hit just as many hills in town as we did on the trail. Very few towns had flat, long walks (Lauterbrunnen is one exception). If you want to deviate from the main street or explore at all, you’re walking up some big-ass hills.

Be prepared, especially when booking your hotel or Airbnb. We looked at one in Wengen, but thankfully I read the reviews before clicking “book.” Everyone said it was beautiful, but the 15-minute steep hill you had to walk up and down each day was brutal. (We walked that hill. Can confirm—brutal.) Now imagine that with a large roller suitcase.

Itinerary coming soon

I took incredible notes every single day of our trip. I even organized my photos by day, to make it easier to share our plans. This was hands-down the most active vacation I’ve ever had, and that’s saying something. When I’m home and rested, I’ll share all the details, including:

• Our day-by-day itinerary

• Our hiking trails with mileage, elevation gain/loss, and trail maps

• What I packed (and how I packed it)

• What we ate

• What we spent (I don’t even want to add it up)

I’ll also share what I wish we’d done differently, because there were a few things. What do you want to know about my Switzerland trip? Share in comments and I’ll be sure to work it into my write-ups.

Leave a comment

XO, MU

My sister and I will be hiking in Switzerland for eight glorious days in mid-June. We’re visiting the areas of Wengen and Kandersteg, and have more hikes on our wish list than we could possibly do in just eight days. (We’re going to try!)

I’ve been an avid hiker for 15 years. I’ve hiked all around the globe, in every condition, from ice and snow to pouring rain to desert heat. I’ve splurged on some good gear, but these things have held up beautifully across the years. I already own every piece of hiking gear I need.

So why do I have six browser tabs open, each with at least three things sitting in my cart? Trail runners, sandals, pants, rain jackets, base layers, shorts… Apparently, I need an entirely new wardrobe if I want to hike in Switzerland. At least, that’s what I’m getting from TikTok.

The algorithm is algorithming

I started off innocently searching for “hiking in Switzerland.” The TikTok algorithm is great—far better than Instagram’s. Immediately, I found video after video sharing the best hikes in each region, what to expect from the weather, and insider tips on train passes and keeping your trip budget-friendly.

I also found many videos of “what I packed to hike in the Alps” and “what I wore for my trip to Europe.” Not every video applied. I’m spending two days in Milan, but most of our time will be in small mountain towns—I don’t need evening wear. But the hiking outfits sucked me right in. That, and the “what are the most comfortable sandals for walking in Europe?” There are apparently hundreds of those videos, as if walking in Europe is dramatically different than walking in the U.S. (We have uneven terrain and cobblestones here too.)

Some of the outfits were cah-yoot. Baggy pants, cropped tanks, coordinated hiking boots, stylishly-tied bandanas, mirrored sunnies… I love seeing super-fashionable outfits on the trails. You look amazing! Have a great hike!

But I started to think that I needed new gear. I have baggy pants, cute tanks, and jackets… but if I had NEW pants, tanks, and jackets, how much cuter could I look in our epic photos? I didn’t just want the experience—I wanted to look like the cool people having the experience. (I say that as a 52-year-old mom, mind you. I will admit peer pressure can still get to me.)

I went into an online shopping trance and ordered a bunch of stuff before coming to my senses. (Or, being brought to my senses by ill-fitting clothing.) The pants were too short. The shoes weren’t comfortable. The rain jackets had too small a hood, or were too baggy. I gratefully took this as a sign from the Universe: “Girl, you don’t need to spend $1,000 on new clothes for this trip. Save that money for a delicious dinner or a Switzerland spa day.”

You. Don’t. Need. New. Stuff.

The more content you consume, the easier it becomes to mistake preparation for consumption. This is one of the curses of social media. TikTok makes it far too easy to see what everyone else is buying and wearing. Trends are so highly specific—you don’t just pack sunglasses, you pack wrap-around sunglasses in silver. Influencer “hauls” have become so commonplace that we’re desensitized to overconsumption. Buying bags of new clothes every week isn’t normal, sustainable, or healthy (for the environment, your mental health, or your wallet), but influencers do their jobs well, and we are all influenced.

@abbeysadleiroh so you wanna know what the girls are wearing in the Dolomites? photo credit to @trina thomas and others if you lmk who hehe x 🇮🇹 The girls in the Dolomites! Welcome to Italy! 🇮🇹🏔️ #dolomites #Hiking #italy #hikingtrip #travel Dolomites Lago Di braise Dolomites hotel Dolomites outfit

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To be clear, there is nothing wrong with people sharing fashion trends. This woman isn’t telling anyone to buy all this stuff. But social media makes it all too easy to compare yourself to other people—and more often than not, come up short. And it’s hard not to be swept up in an algorithm that makes it seem like everyone but you is wearing this, doing this, buying this.

I’m now actively packing for Switzerland. I started setting aside clothes that I can mix and match easily, so everything fits in a carry-on. It turns out I already had almost everything I needed. I bought one pair of hiking pants that fit better than my old pair, and walking sandals that were super comfortable. (My Birkenstocks, which are usually a ride-or-die, have been bugging my left foot lately.)

After clearing all my online carts, here is what I am now taking from social media, and what I’m leaving behind:

• Switzerland in June: Please do give me the typical weather, how touristy different towns are, how much snow is still left at higher elevations, and other tips relevant to my trip. This info is invaluable.

• Hiking and activities. TikTok and IG are great for discovering hikes, trains, towns, or activities you may not otherwise have heard about. I’ve got a “Switzerland” folder on both platforms, which I then transfer to our Google Doc.

• Packing tips. “What I pack in my carry-on for Europe” and “how to pack to maximize space” have given me great ideas for taking only what I need.

• Clothing recommendations. If you actually need a comfy pair of walking sandals, a rain jacket that actually keeps you dry, or hiking pants for tall people, TikTok is great for crowd-sourcing. Just be specific in your searches. (This is how I found my new sandals, from a brand I’d never heard of.)

• Switzerland logistics. Which plug adapter do I need? Which train tickets should I buy? Where can we find budget-friendly meals? I’ll take any practical insider tips and tricks, thank you very much.

Finally, please remember, nobody cares what you’re wearing on the trail (or on your run, or in the gym). Functionality, comfort, and safety should always come before trendy or stylish. Your photos are going to look glorious whether your rain jacket is 10 years old or brand-new.

Wear what makes you feel good, safe, and comfortable. Then, forget about your outfit and spend all of your time and attention on the experience. Replaying those memories is 100% free, and they’ll last you far longer than a pair of trendy cargo hiking pants.

XO, MU

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This is my weekly series for subscribers only, where I’ll share things that caught my eye this week in a fun and flirty way (kiss), a sustainable way (marry), or a not-so-good way (kill). And yes, this trendy game is technically “f***, marry, or kill” but we run a family-friendly-ish show around here.

Kiss (things I like right now)

📕 The Revenge Party by Emily Lynn Paulson (←read with my eyes)

If you are a woman who has ever been manipulated, gaslit, or deceived by a man, welcome to your next beach read. I’m rubbing my hands together in glee, that’s how satisfying this book is. Is that a spoiler? Not at all, because there are twists galore in this book, and you’ll never see them coming. But I need you to know that this is a story that ends in a satisfying fashion, because as women, our real-life stories of terrible men rarely do.

The plot: A suburban housewife believes she’s happily remarried after a painful divorce. She discovers her husband/the stepfather to her kids isn’t at all who he pretends to be. She’s devastated. Horrified. Powerless.

And then she fights back.

Please don’t read the Amazon description! Although it doesn’t give away much, I’d love for you to go into this book completely fresh, as I did. (I got an advance copy; it just published in May.)

The book is fun, infuriating at times, and more than a little wild, especially in the back half. Remember I mentioned the twists? You’d better pay attention, because they come out of NOWHERE, and once made me stop, flip back, and go, “HOLY SHIT.” (You’ll know it when you get there.) Have fun with this one—I sure did!

Lately I've been dressing for revenge

You get a two-fer today, because Emily’s first book, Hey, Hun, was equally enthralling and gleefully chaotic… but this one is actually a true story. It chronicles Emily’s meteoric rise in an MLM (multi-level marketing company)—and just as spectacular fall. I highlighted this one when it came out; read my full review here:

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Surely you’ve heard of maxxing by now. (When a trend makes it to Oprah Daily, you know it’s in the zeitgeist.) “Maxxing” basically means “ruthlessly optimizing,” and it’s been applied to everything from food (proteinmaxxing, fibermaxxing) to lifestyle (sleepmaxxing, productivitymaxxing) to finances (retirementmaxxing).

The trend started with looksmaxxing: becoming as attractive as possible according to a set of prescribed criteria. Think of it as maximizing your full potential, taken to an often ridiculous and harmful level. (We’ll move past its highly toxic roots in incel culture and manosphere communities, as the concept has evolved into the mainstream.) Looksmaxxing can range from skincare and haircuts to plastic surgery and steroid use—quite the spread, right? (We’ll come back to this.)

The concept quickly spread into other areas:

• Proteinmaxxing: Optimizing your food choices to ensure maximum protein intake. Logging every bite to ensure accuracy and compliance.

• Fibermaxxing: Same, but with fiber. (Oprah called it “poopmaxxing.”)

• Sleepmaxxing: Arrange your habits and routines to ensure perfect sleep scores (because, of course, you’re tracking this too).

• Financemaxxing: Maximizing every dollar, your earning potential, savings, and investments. (Also involves—you guessed it—rigorous tracking.)

It’s also spawned parodies like “seniormaxxing,” which suggests you pull up your pants real high, move to a quiet RV community in Florida, complain about “kids these days,” and spend hours nursing a coffee and reading the paper. Honestly, this is the only maxxing I’d consider.

More is better… right?

Some of this is certainly a good thing. If you want to feel more confident in your appearance, exercising and skincare are great practices to adopt. If you want to eat more protein, read your labels and base most of your meals around a protein source. If you want to better prepare for retirement, increase your contribution to a 401K or Roth IRA.

However, by definition, “maxxing” doesn’t imply doing what you can (reasonably) or putting in more effort. It means doing as much as you possibly can—and that should be an immediate red flag. Anything that demands 100% effort all the time leaves little room for joy, flexibility, rest, or real life.

Everything has a cost. In the extreme, looksmaxxing influencers have gone under the knife, taken illegal drugs, and risked their health (and lives) to look more conventionally attractive. But even in less extreme scenarios, the cost still exists. Proteinmaxxing might mean outspending your grocery budget, or saying no to delicious foods that aren’t protein-dense. Retirementmaxxing might mean saying no to a restorative vacation or a home improvement project you’d enjoy today. Sleepmaxxing means you “can’t” stay up past your bedtime for a special occasion.

Also, if you’re really maxxing, that means you’re also religiously tracking. This might work in one area of life, like tracking your spending while trying to pay down debt. But tracking that closely comes with its own issues. It’s time-consuming, anxiety-provoking, and it can lead to resentment and rebellion.

We are already exhausted

I am in menopause, living in <waves arms around in a general fashion> whatever this is. I am not maxxing shit. I do not want to optimize anything. In fact, I resent the suggestion that I should be. (Maxxing culture also assumes you have abundant time, money, energy, childcare, and mental bandwidth—a luxury for most people.)

I want to sleep well, but I also want to take my kid out for ice cream on a holiday weekend at 9 PM. (There goes my proteinmaxxing too.) I want to exercise, but nobody is paying me to squat more or increase my VO2 max. I am saving for retirement, but I will pull from my savings to take a once-in-a-lifetime hiking trip with my sister.

TBH, I don’t think most of you are feeling the urge to “maxx,” but we (especially women) are under the constant pressure to improve. I’ll be the first to tell you: You don’t have to improve either.

Sometimes, it’s enough just to get by. You’re eating fine, sleeping okay, exercising some days, and almost always remembering sunscreen. In the context of the uncertainty we’re living in, you’re doing just fine. And if you find some things are slipping in a stressful season, that’s fine too. Normal. Healthy, even—you can’t do it all to the same degree of awesome 100% of the time.

Aside: Part of me wonders if maxxing has such a hold right now, especially with younger people, because we’re in a hellscape. When everything feels so awful and out of control, it’s natural to want to control something. Putting so much energy into improving your looks, diet, fitness, or finances can also be a welcome distraction from the news.

If you do want to tune up some of your practices, you can do that without the pressure to maximize, optimize, or track the living crap out of it.

• Start adding protein to your snacks too.

• Read labels for a week and see how much fiber is actually in your food.

• Swap your phone for a book before bed.

• Open a high-yield savings and auto-deposit part of your paycheck.

• Track your macros, sleep, or budget… but only for a short period.

For me, the older I get, the less I care about optimizing or improving. Yes, occasionally I get fired up to complete a goal in the gym, on the trail, or with my finances. But most of the time, I’m happy letting good enough be good enough, and spending that extra time and energy I’d use “maxxing” to move slower, recover, be kind to myself, and spend time doing restorative things.

Maybe I’m restmaxxing?

XO, MU

This is my weekly series for subscribers only, where I’ll share things that caught my eye this week in a fun and flirty way (kiss), a sustainable way (marry), or a not-so-good way (kill). And yes, this trendy game is technically “f***, marry, or kill” but we run a family-friendly-ish show around here.

Kiss (solid 4-star books)

My Husband’s Wife, Alice Feeney (←listened with my ears)

This audiobook was wild in a really fun way, with one small exception. (It was minor! I give this book 4.33 stars, in a delicious ear candy kind of way.) First, the narrator, Bel Powley, was incredible. I am so bummed she hasn’t narrated more that I’m going to start a petition. Also the writing was fun as hell, and I am totally stealing the phrase, “Off you f***.” The story has real twists; I didn’t know where any of it was going, right up until the end. The only weirdness was that, for no reason whatsoever, the producer would throw in sound effects. Like, the book would be normally narrated for 45 minutes, and then the character says, “I took off running,” and out of nowhere, you hear the sound of feet slapping on on pavement and heavy breathing. It was jarring and annoying and completely unnecessary, but this is still a must-listen if you’re into Nerd gummy clusters in your ears. (I love those things.)

Off you... Sorry, "See the book."

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We all know IQ (Intelligence Quotient), which measures cognitive abilities like memory, logic, and verbal comprehension. Most of us know EQ too. Emotional Quotient (or Emotional Intelligence) is the ability to name, understand, manage, and use emotions effectively.

Now, thanks to Liz Tran’s new book, a new quotient has entered the chat… and you’re going to want to pay attention. Meet AQ, or Agility Quotient.

AQ is the ability to handle change, uncertainty, and the unknown. These are skills you’ll use to manage stress, solve problems, and tackle crises at home, in the workplace, and in relationships.

The concept comes from Liz Tran, author of AQ: A New Kind of Intelligence for a World That’s Always Changing. Her book is focused on AQ in the workplace, helping you navigate instability, uncertainty, and the resulting burnout. But AQ skills are valuable everywhere—in relationships, finances, and certainly emergencies.

And it’s a skill I’ve been working on for years, before the idea of “AQ” ever hit my radar.

Steady as a rock (until I crash out)

Professionally, I’d like to think I’m great with stress, change, and things going wrong. I’m quick to pivot, with an attitude of, “This is happening, YES we can get this done, here’s what we tackle first.” I’ve run such a lean team for so long that we’re all pretty used to pivoting on a dime, rearranging content plans, and spinning up last-minute projects quickly. At work, I also remain steady and reassuring where others may get anxious or negative.

Personally, however, it’s another matter.

Brandon noticed this when we first started dating. I’d say, “Let’s leave at noon” (to run errands, go to the farmers market, or head to the park with the kid). These were trips with no deadline; we didn’t have reservations, we weren’t meeting other people. I just had an idea that we’d leave at noon.

Then we’d hit a snag, and by 11:59 AM I would be irritated, anxious, and obvious about it. We had a plan. This is not the plan. Cue the crash out.

I don’t know why I had such an AQ discrepancy between my work life and home life. I don’t know why, when it doesn’t matter at all whether we leave at noon or 11:55 or 12:10, I got disproportionately upset when things didn’t go exactly the way I expected them to go in my head. But I did, and Brandon quickly figured that out too.

This didn’t just happen when we were running late; it also popped up with any plans I made inside my head. We’d go to the gym, hit Roots for breakfast, then head to the park. But Roots had an unexpectedly long wait—and now I’m spiraling. I had these “perfect” plans in my head, and a monkey wrench in the works felt like a major crisis. (Just to me, of course, because I was the only one with a very specific vision of The Plan.)

A day of reckoning

During moments when I wasn’t crashing out, Brandon would talk to me about what he was observing, and how it was affecting us. When I leapt from calm and excited to tightly-wound and angry, those emotions seeped into everyone else. Making my family swim in my anger and negativity was not fun for anyone, and it certainly didn’t help us get out the door faster.

Much of the time, however, the “snag” was all in my head. “It’s like you have this idea of how every single minute is going to go, and you get thrown off or disappointed if anything disrupts that,” Brandon said to me. He was right. In truth, 99% of the time, it literally did not matter that things went slightly “off-plan.” And forcing everyone else to adhere to a strict timetable that only lived inside my head wasn’t fair to them—or to me.

This came to a head one Saturday when we were trying to get out the door to paddle board. For one, I’m always anxious about summer outings. I want to leave early, because what if it’s crowded? What if there’s no parking? Despite the fact that hundreds of people figure this out every single weekend, the parking situation always gives me anxiety. (P.S. Not once have we arrived at a lake or trailhead and not been able to park.)

On top of leaving early, we were going to take two cars because we had a few kids with us, and a lot of stuff. We got the cars all packed up, then realized Brandon’s car battery was dead. Immediate crash-out. We were going to be late! It wasn’t going to fit! We might as well not go! On this occasion, my stress dial turned all the way to 11, and I was beside myself with worry and frustration.

Brandon physically took me by the shoulders, turned me around, and told me to go inside. He was calm and kind, but he meant it. So I did. Six minutes later, he came inside to get me. Everything was packed—a tight fit, but it fit. The kids were in the car, snacks and water at the ready. And we were ready to go, just like that.

That was the moment when I firmly decided, I will not do this anymore. Not to myself, and not to anyone else.

My AQ Improvement Plan

Thanks in part to Brandon’s interventions, I was able to quickly identify potential triggers and notice the second I felt my calm starting to slip. Ironically, I now needed a plan for when the plan went sideways. I created tactics to help me reframe the situation, self-regulate my emotions, and improve my agility in the face of change, disappointment, and challenges.

Here’s what I do now, when the plan in my head isn’t coming together perfectly IRL:

1. Remind myself, “It doesn’t matter.” This was a self-imposed, arbitrary deadline. We cannot be ‘late’ because there is nothing to be ‘late’ for.

2. Go “worst case scenario.” This is the fastest, most effective way out of my spiral. What’s the worst that could happen? We’ll have to park farther away. We’ll get there at 3:20, not 3:00, which affects literally nothing. We’ll find another place to eat. Uh, that’s it? Yes, that’s it, Melissa. This is NBD.

3. Take several deep breaths. A physical action helps me remember that crashing out won’t get us out the door faster—and in fact will likely prevent our smooth deployment. Even if it did help, we’d all get into the car stressed and annoyed, which is the opposite of the intention. Chill, and you’ll all be happier.

4. Reinforce this out loud. This helps me, but it also helps Brandon see he doesn’t now have to manage both me and the situation. “All good, we’re not on a deadline here.” “Take your time, we’re not on a schedule.” “Getting stressed isn’t going to help. We’ll get there when we get there.”

Brandon has told me several times (gratefully) that I’ve become much better about handling changes and challenges. I can feel a difference, too. And now that my son is older, I like setting this example for him. We were late for school the other day—he woke up late, forgot to get socks, couldn’t find his laptop. It also happened to be a traffic-y day due to construction. “I’m going to be late,” he worried. “Maybe,” I replied, “But getting stressed isn’t going to make traffic go any faster. And if you are late, it’ll only be by a few minutes, and I’ll call the school to excuse the tardiness.” We ended up arriving on time, with zero persons stressed or cranky. Big win.

Much like EQ can be learned and improved, so can AQ—and it’s a worthy pursuit. Challenges, curveballs, and change are a certainty in life. Building the skills to navigate these scenarios with calm, grounded energy and acceptance will benefit you (and the people around you) across the board.

The quiz

In the book, Liz offers four archetypes for AQ: The Neurosurgeon, The Novelist, The Firefighter, and The Astronaut. The book details high-level descriptions of each, but you can take the quiz here (it’s free). I came back a Firefighter, which mostly resonates, but some aspects were way off; I think I’m a blend of Firefighter and Astronaut.

How high would you rate your AQ? Is this a skill you’ve been working on, or something you’d like to cultivate? Leave your thoughts in comments.

XO, MU

This email contains affiliate links. I make a small commission when you purchase through my link. We’ve had an Eight Sleep on our bed since 2023. I can count on three fingers the number of times I’ve had to refill the water tank, and I’ve had zero night sweats or hot flashes since installing it. It’s a game-changer, especially for menopause.

This is my weekly series for subscribers only, where I’ll share things that caught my eye this week in a fun and flirty way (kiss), a sustainable way (marry), or a not-so-good way (kill). And yes, this trendy game is technically “f***, marry, or kill” but we run a family-friendly-ish show around here.

Kiss (things I like right now)

📕 Yesteryear by Caro Claire Burke (←read with my eyes)

Note: No spoilers here, but I am going to give away the shape of the book. Skip this section if you want to go in totally blind, but I wish I had a bit more context before diving in.

Yesteryear was not what I expected, and I haven’t yet fully landed as to how I feel about it.

This has been one of the most hyped books of the year, and it’s topical as hell. The premise (as far as I understood it): A “trad wife” influencer (think “millions of followers, kids as content, organic, low-tox, #farmlife #blessed”) wakes up one morning magically transported to the late 1800s, where she learns what it really means to be a trad wife in pioneer days.

I assumed this would be a fun and snarky beach read. This is how it went in my head: The influencer would be exposed for the hypocrisy of promoting “trad wife” values while building a literal empire through influencing. She’d be a fake internet persona, calculated in her image-crafting and hiding much of her reality from her fans. (Underneath it all, she’d be likeable. Maybe even relatable.) She’d be booted back in time in an ironic twist of fate, designed to teach her a lesson about values, gender roles, and what’s really important. She’d then… (here’s where it got vague for me—I didn’t know how it would end, but I was excited to find out).

I was right about some of it. I could not have been more wrong on the rest. It was so much darker than anticipated. And weirder. I felt like I was being seriously jerked around, which means the author is talented, as my experience mirrored that of the protagonist. Maybe the author is also dark and weird? Either way, Burke surprised me, but not in a, “Surprise, I brought home the cupcakes you’ve been craving.” More, “Surprise, I got the kids a puppy that neither the kids nor I will be training or walking, and also the puppy is a coyote.” Does that count as a spoiler?

I could say much more but (a) I err on the cautious side of what you’d consider a “spoiler,” and (b) I don’t share books I didn’t love, and I’m ON THE FENCE HERE. Let’s just say, I either loved it against my will… or it was one of the worst books I’ve read since I Who Have Never Known Men. (Note, this is embodied in the comment section of every TikTok review I’ve seen.)

To summarize, if you’re looking for, “trad wife gets an ironic but cute comeuppance with a satisfying redemption arc,” for your summer vacation, this ain’t it. But I’m still recommending it, because I have to talk about it with someone.

Don't read the reviews

🗣 How to speak

I’m asked often for pointers on public speaking. I speak quite a bit, on podcasts, TV, and at live events. I don’t use filler words, I appear comfortable on stage, and I’m able to roll with any direction the conversation takes.

Read more

Is this you?

• “‘I’m too nervous to join a gym.”

• “I have a gym membership, but I’m too intimidated to go.”

• “I go to the gym, but I feel so out of place.”

Walking into room full of people who appear fit and capable can be intimidating. Mindset helps; giving yourself permission not to be a gold-medal exerciser right away can feel like a huge weight off (pun intended). But in the moment, you need something concrete.

Here are 5 practical tactics you can take in any gym, whether you’re a newbie or seeking more confidence.

1. Write down your workouts

Walking around the gym without a plan can be stress-inducing. You’re not sure if you should do cardio or lift weights, every treadmill is taken, you don’t know how to set up a squat rack, and now you’re overwhelmed.

Think about how much more manageable your to-do list feels when you write it down, versus trying to remember it all. Walking into the gym with a plan provides the same sense of confidence and calm. It also reduces decision fatigue (should I do legs, arms, or cardio) and helps you know exactly where to start.

2. Walk around and scope things out

Every time I visit a new gym, I take time to walk through the space to get oriented. Where is the cardio section? Where do they have mats? Where are the dumbbells? So start your workouts by taking a stroll. Notice which areas are crowded, which equipment is open, and where you could start. This practice will help you get more comfortable with the space, the patterns you may start to see (everyone wants to bench on Monday), and where to find specific equipment.

You may think this makes you look like a newbie, but nobody thinks it’s weird to see people walking around. (Maybe they’re between sets. Maybe they’re catching their breath. Nobody cares.) You can do this every time you walk into the gym, or until you get familiar with the space, equipment, and your own routines.

3. Watch YouTube videos in the gym

Don’t guess at how a machine works or how to perform a safe deadlift. You can learn right there in the gym! Pull up a video walking you through that specific machine, demonstrating proper form for an exercise, or troubleshooting common mistakes. You can even follow along with an app or YouTube workout!

Of course, be mindful if others are waiting for your equipment, and don’t stop in a place that obstructs traffic. (But half the gym is on their phone between sets anyway.) If you’re able to video yourself doing the movement without disturbing or recording others, you can also compare your form to the video tutorial.

4. Treat the gym like a lab, not a test

I fall over, fail lifts, and mess up movements all the time. I treat the gym, various exercises, and my workout routines like an experiment, not a pass/fail exam. Your workout isn’t a test, so take your time and get comfortable in each exercise.

Adjust the seat or handles on your machine to see what feels best. Experiment with light weight, a PVC pipe, or your own bodyweight. Use different handle options, or try both arms versus one arm at a time. Move through the motion slowly, observe the limits of your mobility or flexibility, and adjust for your own body and mechanics.

5. Give yourself permission to learn

Remember, you don’t have to “earn” your place in the gym. Everyone was new once. Let yourself be new! Embrace that you’re still learning. Frankly, “I’m always learning” is still my mindset, and it serves me well.

The athletes in my gym are some of the fittest I’ve ever seen. They are also the most welcoming and supportive. We love when people commit to their health and fitness, at any age, ability, or size. Remember that when you feel nervous, intimidated, or like you don’t belong. You do, and I know that because you’re here, in the gym with us.

Your 10-minute road map

The next time you plan a gym day, here’s what I want you to do:

1. Plan your workout, and write down the exercises you’ll be performing.

2. When you walk in, take a lap and get oriented.

3. Watch a tutorial if you need help with a movement.

4. Make the adjustments you need to feel safe and comfortable.

5. Then… begin your workout. That’s it!

Confidence doesn’t come before you start, it comes because you start. Use these tips to make your next gym day rewarding and empowering.

What’s the hardest part about going to the gym for you? Leave a comment!

Leave a comment

XO, MU

It was May 2016. My son had just turned 3, and his dad and I were finalizing our divorce (a process that took a year and a half). This was the first Mother’s Day that I was officially solo parenting; the year before we were in the middle of The Whole30 book tour and putting on a convincing(ish) show of togetherness.

That Mother’s Day in 2016, my parents came to visit. I’m not sure if they came because it was Mother’s Day, or if it was just the best time for them to travel. Either way, I was grateful to have them there. We made reservations for a fancy brunch buffet, celebrating our two generations of moms. I remember doing my hair, picking out a dress (it was black… subconscious foreshadowing?), and putting my son in a cute outfit.

The day was beautiful. Brunch was delicious, my son was adorable and happy, and my parents were thrilled to spend time with their grandson. I, however, was miserable, and so self-conscious. Everyone saw me there with my kid… and my parents. Not a husband. Not even a boyfriend. I felt like there was a red neon arrow over my head blinking, “Divorced! Alone! Sad!” I thought everyone was watching, and judging. I saw grinning moms sit at their tables with their husbands and their children and felt like a loser.

I have photos from that day, but my smile was forced. I thought, “This is how Mother’s Day is going to feel from now on.”

The reframe

I would spend the next few Mother’s Days as a solo parent, but none were as hard as that first year. (I’d venture to say nothing was as hard as that first year, when it came to parenting.) I was doing a lot of therapy, and letting go of some of the stressful stories I had around my divorce.

I began to reframe my “flying solo” status as empowering, not sad. My son and I had a clean slate, free to create our own traditions. I could do it any way I wanted! We could do traditional Mother’s Day stuff, plan our idea of a special day, or treat it like any other Sunday. I was rebuilding my life, recovering my self-confidence, and creating new non-negotiables for myself and my son.

Most important—I never again had to sit through a “traditional” Mother’s Day (or Christmas, or anniversary) pretending to be happy. That thought, combined with, “I can do it any way I want,” became my touchstone for the next few years.

In the years following, I approached Mother’s Days differently. One year, I spent a leisurely 90 minutes at the gym (they had a great daycare), then went to the park, where my kid rode his scooter and played on the playground. The next year, we went on a snowy hike, where we played in the snow and a nice person took a great photo of us. The year after that, it was the gym, out for breakfast at our favorite diner, then bought myself flowers on the way home.

For me, the flowers were the ultimate power move. Yes, I’m buying them for myself. Yes, I feel great about it.

If people saw us—just a mom and her kid on Mother’s Day—I felt proud instead of embarrassed. We were owning this day. I was his mother. This was MY day. I didn’t need a husband or boyfriend to celebrate me, or legitimize me. I was celebrating my own damn self.

For you

If you are also parenting solo or single this Mother’s Day, here are a few things I wish someone had told me in those early days.

You can do Mother’s Day any way you want. You don’t have to make a big deal out of it. You can make a huge deal out of it. You can go out. You can stay home. You can do anything any other mom does, including taking yourself and your kids out for a fancy, dressed-up brunch, then buying yourself flowers. It’s YOUR day.

You can also opt out. You don’t have to celebrate Mother’s Day. You can treat it like any other Sunday. Tell your kids, “I celebrate being your mom every day. Let’s just relax, watch movies, and order pizza tonight.” If it feels too hard, skip the fanfare.

Nobody is judging you. Nobody is watching you, specifically. Nobody is making judgments about what kind of mom you are. Celebrating with your kids isn’t stressful. The story, “They’re judging me,” is the stressful part. You could just drop it. If someone is looking over at you, you can always tell yourself, “They think my kids are cute,” or “They’re divorced and know how I feel.” Those are just stories too, but they’re far kinder to yourself (and equally likely to be true).

You never know who you are inspiring. You are not the only solo or single parent out with kids on Mother’s Day. There are other moms who feel like I did that first year—uncertain, embarrassed, sad, or lonely. Watching you celebrate this day (and yourself) with your kids might be the inspiration or permission they need to do the same.

To every mom: May you have the kind of Mother’s Day that serves you best, whatever that looks like. Know that we are here, cheering you on.

XO, MU

P.S. Grab a copy of Honest Motherhood wherever books are sold, for you and for a mom you love. (This would make a fantastic book club read!)

This post contains affiliate links. We make a small commission when you purchase through our link.

I remember my first hike in the White Mountains of NH. I was in high school, and my new boyfriend invited me on a day hike. I had no idea what I was doing. I brought a tiny bottle of water, no snacks, and no layers. I wore sneakers. I don’t remember much of the trail or views because I was just trying to not fall down. I definitely thought, “This is not fun.”

Today, hiking is life. I’ve solo-hiked trails from Norway to Banff, in U.S. National and State Parks, and hundreds of local trails on road trips through the west. Hiking may seem intimidating, but most trails are just walking—sometimes uphill, sometimes with obstacles. If you can walk, you can hike!*

Also, hiking doesn’t have to be uphill or have obstacles. Flat trails count as hiking. Paved trails count as hiking. City trails count as hiking. Very short trails count as hiking. Much like with running, there is no gatekeeping who and who is not a hiker, which is your first “introduction to hiking” lesson.

Are you walking on a trail or path? You’re a hiker! And all you need to get started are these 3 things.

*If you use a wheelchair or other mobility device, you are also hiking! There are plenty of accessible trails, and hiking is NOT just for the able-bodied.

1. Pick a trail

There are a number of ways to find a trail. Google “hiking trails near me” or “easy hikes in Salt Lake City.” Find a hike through word of mouth, like a friend or your city’s Reddit community. Ask a local REI or outdoor store team member for their favorite trails. You can visit your local parks’ websites.

My favorite place to start is the AllTrails app. There is a free version that lets you search for trails, and (with location services turned on) will automatically show you trails in your area. The Pro version lets you download trail maps, which I’d highly recommend for everyone, especially if you’re new. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve lost the trail in snow, near water, or in rocky landscapes. The map is highly accurate even without cell service, and will get you back on track.

AllTrails lets you filter trails by difficulty (easy, moderate, hard, strenuous); by feature (dog-friendly, wheelchair-friendly); distance; or elevation gain. It also features hikes on your explore page, like “best views” or “weekend worthy.”

When you click into a trail, here are three things to review:

1. Distance: Look at the total distance. Is this an “out-and-back” (where the mileage includes the hike out and the hike back); a loop (where you start and end in the same place); or a “point-to-point” (where you end in a different place, requiring a shuttle or some other way to get back to your car). Some trails are less than a mile out-and-back, and that still counts as hiking.

2. Elevation gain: This tells you how much you’ll climb on this trail. You must compare elevation gain to the mileage. Also remember on an out-and-back, all of the elevation gain is almost always in the first half of the trail. (You’ll climb UP to the end of the trail, than back down to your car.) A 2-mile out-and-back trail with 800 feet of gain doesn’t sound steep, but if all of that gain happens on the 1 mile hike out, you’ll realize it’s pretty dang steep.

Tap on the trail map in AllTrails to see a line graph of the elevation gain. This will show you if the trail is mostly flat with a very steep start or finish, or if the elevation gain is spaced pretty evenly throughout.

3. Description and Reviews: The trail description will give you important information about seasonality, parking, and whether the trail is dog-friendly. The reviews are even more helpful, as people will share specifics about current trail conditions, snow/ice/mud, tricky spots, wildlife, tips for going clockwise or counterclockwise, and more. Always read the reviews the morning of your hike!

Choose a trail suited to your ability. If you’re not sure what you could do, start off conservatively, with a short, easy trail to build your confidence. It’s far better to get back to the car and say, “That felt great, I could have gone longer!” Don’t run the risk of injury, heat exhaustion, or dehydration on a trail you’re not prepared for.

Also, check the weather the morning of your hike, in the area where you’ll be hiking. (If your trail starts at the bottom of the mountain, search for weather on the mountain, not down in the valley.) If you’re in an area where mid-afternoon thunderstorms are the norm, or rain or wind is predicted, you’ll want to pack accordingly.

2. Get dressed and pack your gear

I know this meme exists, but THIS IS NOT THE VIBE, and whoever says that is a jerk. Being under-prepared is not a flex. Being prepared (or even over-prepared) is cool. If you feel better taking extra layers, packing poles, and wearing an InReach, PLEASE DO THAT.

Having said that, you don’t need “specialty” equipment to hike. You can hit the trail in sturdy shoes with good traction, your normal athletic wear, and any old pack. However, some attention to detail can make the difference between a happy, safe hike; and slipping, chafing, or sweating like crazy.

• Shoes: You can hike in sneakers (or Crocs, or flip-flops—I’ve seen it all), but this is one area where I’d buy something specific. Consider a trail running sneaker or a light hiking boot, and try them on with the kind of socks you’ll be wearing. The most important point is that it fits your foot well, is comfortable, and feels stable on rocks, dirt, and mixed terrain.

• Socks: Avoid 100% cotton, or your feet will sweat and you may get blisters. I like a wool-blend light hiking sock.

• Pants/tops: If you wear gym-wear, you’ll do fine. Avoid jeans or 100% cotton here too, but as long as the weather is decent (above 50, not raining) just about anything else goes. You do want layers (like a light windbreaker, a base layer, a long-sleeved sun hoodie, and/or a rain jacket) in case it’s colder by the lake, you need sun or bug protection, or the weather shifts.

• Pack: I like a small backpack (15L) for a day hike, to make sure I can carry extras like a small towel, a book, and binoculars. You also might be able to take a running belt or trail vest for shorter excursions. Make sure whatever you bring is comfortable and can hold everything you need, especially water.

• Safety: In my pack, I keep a bandana, a Kula Cloth, Band-Aids, eye drops, extra contacts, matches, a small multi-tool, a small bottle of bug spray, a travel-sized sunscreen, and my Garmin INREACH. I wear contacts, so lens care is a priority. You may want your inhaler, ibuprofen, an ACE bandage, reading glasses, or other safety items specific to your context.

Bandanas are the ultimate hiking accessory. They can be used for sun or bug protection, in dusty conditions, for cooling (soak in a stream or lake), to mop up sweat, to provide first aid, or to offer padding against a chafing waistband or backpack strap.

3. Add water, electrolytes, and snacks

Finally, every hiker needs plenty of water, plenty of snacks, and maybe some electrolytes. I’ll always encourage you to over-prepare here. Running out of water, electrolytes, or food can turn a fun hike into a miserable one—and can put you in a truly dangerous situation.

Water: If I plan on being out for longer than an hour, I’ll take 3 liters of water. I never hike with less than 2 liters of water. Anywhere. Ever. Ideally, you’d have a water reservoir (sometimes called a “hydration bladder”) with a tube to make drinking easy and hands-free. You could also pack a big water bottle or two, though it may not be as comfortable. I always leave extra water in the car just in case.

Electrolytes: If you’re doing something active, sweating, and drinking water, you cannot forget to replenish your electrolytes. I recommend using LMNT Electrolyte drink mix (the stick packs) for hiking, especially in heat and/or at higher elevation. LMNT replenishes precious sodium lost when you sweat, and can improve your energy and keep you muscle-cramp free on the trail. Everyone I’ve given LMNT to before a hike has said, “Wow, that made a huge difference!” Add a packet or two to your water bottle, depending on how much water you’re taking, and your hike. (If I take a 3 liter reservoir, I’ll add two packets.)

Prepare your water + LMNT drink mix the night before and pop it in the fridge overnight. There is nothing as refreshing as icy cold LMNT-infused water on the trail!

Free LMNT sampler pack with every order

Snacks: This is the most variable factor. It depends on when you’re hiking, how long the hike is, and how long it takes you to drive back home. Throw some protein, carbs, and fat in your pack, and extras in a cooler in your car. I always hike with at least 3-4 meat sticks, some pistachios or other nuts, a bag of dried mango, and 1-2 RXBARs, Larabars, or Bobo’s bars. This stuff is small so you can load up with little downside, and it’s always nice to have extra to share with a friend or stranger in trouble.

On longer or hot hikes, avoid anything that needs to be refrigerated (like a mayo-based chicken salad), or anything that’s easy to squish in a pack. (I love a good PB&J on the trail, but I’ll pack it in Tupperware.) Also, don’t eat or drink anything new on the trail. Now is not the time to have a GI disturbance! If you want to add something to your hiking snack pack, experiment at home first.

It may feel like overkill to pack water and snacks for a 1-mile loop around your local park, but packing your bag and carrying it will prepare your body for longer hikes and heavier packs. (And again—you never know.)

Happy trails!

I hope these tips give you the confidence you need to hit the trails this spring and summer! If there’s a hiking question I haven’t addressed here, leave a comment.

XO, MU

This is my weekly series for subscribers only, where I’ll share things that caught my eye this week in a fun and flirty way (kiss), a sustainable way (marry), or a not-so-good way (kill). And yes, this trendy game is technically “f***, marry, or kill” but we run a family-friendly-ish show around here.

Kiss (things I like right now)

📕 Demon Copperhead, Barbara Kingsolver (←read with my eyes)

If you’ve been following along, you’ll know I have tried to listen to this book THREE TIMES. I even bought it on Audible, convinced I’d love it. But every time I started it, I just… lost interest. The narrator wasn’t my cup of tea, and I don’t know why, because his voice was just fine? On top of that, I just couldn’t get into the story. It was just… monotone? One note? I’d heard this book was “love it or hate it,” so I figured I was in the latter camp.

I don’t know what prompted me to download a sample on my Kindle. (Maybe because my sister said it was one of her favorite books of last year, and I trust her opinion.) But I started reading it one night when Brandon was out of town, and I was immediately hooked in a way the audiobook simply couldn’t.

I devoured it. This book and Demon buried into my heart in such a profound way. (I’m not sure there is a character who has come more alive through a book than Demon.) The depictions of what it’s like to live with addiction were stark, realistic, and painful to witness. Demon’s story, in fact, was hard to witness. Still, at no point did I feel “depressed” while reading. (I’ve heard it described this way by many.) The energy of Demon (and Kingsolver’s brilliant prose) kept me deeply invested, and relentlessly hopeful. I lived inside this book for five straight days, and when it was over, I wished I could wipe my memory and read it with fresh eyes.

I know I’m not alone; it’s a Pulitzer Prize-winning book. But it strongly reinforced that (for me) some books need to be read with my eyeballs, while others fare better in audio format. So if someone you trust tells you, “You’ll love this book,” but you can’t get into it… try a different medium. (You can listen to and read samples on Amazon, then borrow in either format using your library card.)

Also, I’ve since tried getting into other Kingsolver books, and none of them are hitting, in either format. If there is one I should absolutely visit next, let me know in comments.

See it on Amazon

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If you’ve been following me for any length of time, you know my morning routine is sacred. I’m not alone! Google Trends shows searches for “morning routine” have skyrocketed since 2020. On TikTok, “#morningroutine” has billions of views. Media outlets started featuring people’s “5 to 9” (their routine before the workday starts).

At this point, everyone has heard that your morning routine is the foundation for a grounded, productive, energetic day. We talk far less about nighttime routines, though. For me, this is just as important, and highly prioritized.

A nighttime routine signals to your brain and nervous system that it’s time to wind down. The actions you take before bed (and those you don’t) can set you up to fall asleep faster, stay asleep longer, and wake feeling more rested. Your routine can reduce stress, support habit formation, and prevent the slow slide into, “It’s midnight?! What have I been doing for the last two hours?”

There is another important reason to bookend your days with a routine. We’re often forced to flex, adapt, and react on the spot to changing work demands, unexpected events, or childcare needs. For someone who craves routine and stability, that can feel chaotic and stressful. But if I start and end my day with a routine, it gives me the stability and predictability I need to stay healthy.

Finally, while the morning routine sets the tone for the day, your evening routine does the same thing—for the next day. It reminds me that I am a healthy person with healthy habits, preps me for a fantastic night’s sleep, and helps me wake up refreshed, energetic, and ready to tackle my morning.

You should build your nighttime routine based on your time, interests, and needs. Here is mine, in five steps.

Sleep experts say one of the most beneficial things you can do for sleep is go to bed at a consistent time. Ideally, you’d fall asleep each night within a 30-minute window, but even 60 minutes would be a great place to start. I start my nighttime routine around 8:30, so I can be in bed reading by 9:00. (I’m an early riser, waking naturally between 5:30 and 6:00 AM.)

Step 1: Clean the kitchen

Before I head into the bedroom, I completely reset the kitchen. This provides a bit of light activity, and ensures my morning is less stressful. (Nothing winds me up more than a cluttered kitchen.) I do all the dishes, return things on the counter to their home, clean off surfaces, take out trash or recycling, and straighten the bar stools. Brandon calls it my “evening putter,” because I do not want help with these tasks. I love this gentle transition between the active part of my day and settling into bed.

Step 2: Wrap my hair

I brush my hair thoroughly, then wrap it for no-heat overnight curls. I do this first to get it out of the way for my skincare, and it only takes 3 minutes. (Bonus: It also takes 3 minutes to “do” my hair in the morning; I just shake it out and give it a brush.)

Step 3: Skincare

I don’t have a long or complex skincare routine. I’ll wash my face, and follow with a toner or serum. I’ve been using tretinoin for two months now, so I’ll spread a thin layer, then let it absorb during the rest of my routine. (I apply moisturizer at the very end.)

Step 4: Tooth care

My evening tooth-care routine is extensive, but this is a good way to remind myself that I am a healthy person with healthy habits. (Who else flosses every night but very healthy people?) First I floss manually. Then I use a water flosser. You don’t know what you’re missing in terms of gum health! This is my secret weapon. Then I brush with a sonic toothbrush for the full two minutes.

My bedtime routine is more enjoyable (and I’m less likely to rush or skip steps) if I listen to an audiobook. I always have one audiobook and one physical book going for this reason. My husband will often come in to find me holding the phone to my ear so I can hear it over my electric toothbruth.

Step 5: Read

My last step is climbing into bed to read. I’ve been reading every night before bed since I was in grade school. It’s my most beloved and longest-running habit. Reading, especially fiction, is the most reliable way to turn off my brain, and keeps me from picking up my phone “one last time.” (My phone does charge in the bedroom, but it’s on DND and upside-down. I never pick it up once I’m in bed.) I’ll read until my eyes are heavy, pop in my Ozlo Sleepbuds, and fall asleep within two minutes flat.

Craft your own routine

Your nighttime routine may be longer or shorter. It may have more steps or fewer. It will probably include different elements, although I encourage you to try my dental care routine! The point is to create something that works for you, then make it a consistent habit. Completing 10 minutes reliably before bed is far more impactful than completing an aspirational 60-minute routine sporadically.

Here are some other actions readers have sent in as part of their nighttime routine:

• Journaling

• Guided meditations

• “Sleepy-time” podcasts

• Warm shower or bath

• Sleep sounds (like ocean noises or rainfall)

• Drinking tea

One last point: There are nights when I can’t or don’t complete my full routine. Don’t be so precious about it that a hitch in the plan spins you out. Sometimes I leave dishes in the sink, cut my skincare short, skip flossing, or read for just a few minutes before I fall asleep. The key is maintaining the spirit of the routine, if not the letter. If your night is interrupted, don’t abandon the whole routine and scroll in despair! Do the parts you can, know you’re maintaining the habit, and try again the following night.

If you find yourself regularly having to cut your routine short, modify it! Figure out what you can drop, shorten, or leave for the morning in a way that still helps you shift into those relaxing pre-bed vibes.

I hope my routine and these suggestions inspire you to dig into your evening routine. Identify what isn’t serving you (ahem, TikTok in bed), then replace those actions with habits that help you wind down, sleep well, and wake up feeling grounded.

Share your evening routine in comments, or ask for help crafting one!

XO, MU

This is the second recipe in my recipe series, and it’s been on repeat all winter. Jenn Leuke is the queen of healthy, easy, family-friendly dinners. I may have more of her recipes bookmarked than any other home chef. She is so generous with what she shares online, and her Substack offers even more recipes, cooking tips, and meal planning strategies.

This Hidden Veggie Spaghetti (page 273) was an immediate hit. It can be made gluten-free, grain-free, or vegan. It’s naturally dairy-free and nut-free, and can easily be free from added sugar. I’ve included Whole30 modifications below, too.

Let me know whether you want more recipes in the comments! I have so many talented friends, and I’d love to share their favorite meals with you here.

Hidden Veggie Spaghetti with Crispy Kale and Sausage

from Don’t Think About Dinner by Jenn Leuke

I call this recipe Hidden Veggie because the pasta sauce is loaded with different vegetables, and you would never know it once it’s blended up. With its multiple components, this one takes a bit more effort (which is why it landed in this chapter), but I promise it’s worth it. Skip the sausage to make it vegetarian/vegan, but don’t skip the crispy kale to top the pasta—that extra step is what “fancy” is all about! Bonus round: The sauce freezes beautifully. You’ll likely have extra sauce left over from this recipe (I like a lot of sauce), so be sure to save any extras in the freezer for another day.

Makes 4 servings • Prep time: 20 minutes Cook time: 45 minutes

FOR THE CRISPY KALE

• 3 cups shredded curly kale (about 4 1⁄2 ounces)

• 2 tablespoons olive oil

• Kosher salt

FOR THE SPAGHETTI AND SAUCE

• 1 teaspoon garlic powder

• 1 teaspoon dried oregano

• Kosher salt

• 1⁄2 teaspoon ground black pepper

• 1⁄4 teaspoon red pepper flakes (optional)

• 2 tablespoons olive oil, plus more as needed

• 1⁄2 pound ground hot or sweet Italian sausage or chicken sausage, removed from links, casings discarded if necessary

• 2 large carrots, small-diced (about 1 cup)

• 1⁄2 large yellow onion, small-diced (about 3⁄4 cup)

• 1 celery rib, small-diced (about 1⁄2 cup)

• One 28-ounce can crushed tomatoes

• 3⁄4 cup canned full-fat coconut milk (about half a well-shaken 13.5-ounce can)

• 14 ounces brown rice spaghetti, rice-and-corn-based spaghetti, or regular

  spaghetti, cooked and kept warm

1. Make the crispy kale: Preheat the oven to 325°F. Line a sheet pan with parchment paper.

2. In a large bowl, combine the kale, oil, and a few pinches of salt and toss with tongs or your clean hands until the kale is evenly coated. Transfer the kale to the prepared sheet pan.

3. Bake until dry and crispy, 25 to 30 minutes. Set aside.

4. Meanwhile, make the spaghetti and sauce: In a small bowl, combine the garlic powder, oregano, 1 teaspoon salt, the black pepper, and red pepper flakes (if using) and set aside.

5. Line a plate with paper towels and set it near the stove. Heat the oil in a large, deep lidded skillet over medium heat until shimmering. Add the sausage and cook, stirring occasionally to break up any large pieces, until browned, 5 to 6 minutes. Use a slotted spoon to transfer the sausage to the paper towels to drain. Set aside.

6. Heat the same skillet over medium heat, adding a drizzle of oil if the pan is too dry. Add the carrots, onion, and celery and cook, stirring occasionally, until very soft, 8 to 10 minutes. Add the spice mixture and cook, continuing to stir occasionally, until fragrant, 3 to 4 minutes. Stir in the crushed tomatoes. Bring to a simmer and cook until slightly reduced and warm, about 5 minutes. Stir in the coconut milk and cook until heated through, about 1 minute. Cover and set aside.

7. Transfer the cooked vegetables to a blender or food processor and, working in batches if needed, blend (with the steam vent open on the blender top) on high speed until completely smooth, about 1 minute.

8. Mix half of the sauce with the cooked pasta until fully coated. Add more sauce if desired. Stir in the cooked sausage until evenly combined.

9. Spoon the pasta into four bowls and top with the crispy kale.

Don't Think About Dinner

MU’s notes

Here are my tips for making this meal:

• I always double the crispy kale, because kale chips are awesome to have on hand.

• I buy ground chicken sausage, and I double the protein to a pound. You could use any ground meat, however, including vegan offerings.

• You can sub heavy cream for the coconut milk in a 1:1 ratio, if you prefer.

• If you wanted to add even more veggies, you could use diced yellow bell pepper, mushrooms, or diced zucchini.

• If you add more veggies, you might want to increase the sauce, or even double it.

Whole30 modifications

It’s easy to make this delicious spaghetti dish Whole30-compatible! Here are the substitutions or omissions you’d make during elimination:

• Make sure your sausage or chicken sausage are Whole30-compatible, with no added sugar or dairy.

• Use veggie noodles (zucchini, butternut squash, spaghetti squash, sweet potato) in place of spaghetti.

If you wanted to use this recipe for your Whole30 reintroduction, here’s what you could add back in, keeping the other Whole30 modifications from above:

• Use chickpea noodles for Legume day.

• Use rice noodles for Non-Gluten Grain day.

• Use heavy cream instead of coconut milk on Dairy day.

• Top with parmesan, Pecorino Romano, or mozzarella cheese on Dairy day.

• Use whole wheat pasta for Gluten Grain day.

Excerpted from Don’t Think About Dinner By Jenn Leuke. Copyright © 2026 by Jenneatsgood LLC. Used by permission of HarperCollins Publishers, New York, NY. All Right reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.

Expo West is the world’s largest trade show for natural and organic foods, beverages, supplements, personal care, and home care products. Every year, I walk the floor with the Whole30 team each year to catch up with our Whole30 Approved partners, evaluate brands for new partnerships, and spot trends for the coming year. After 17 years in health and wellness and a decade at Expo West, it’s become easy to identify the brands, products, ingredients, and trends that are actually going to stick—and what’s just a flash in the ceramic-coated pan.

I also spend a good amount of time researching trends, discoveries, and current events around CPG (consumer packaged goods), food and beverage marketing, the diet industry, and GLP-1s. Over the last year, the one thing all of these sources have in common is an unprecedented focus on protein.

Let’s dig into the what, why, and what’s next for our current macronutrient du jour de l'année.

Protein is everywhere

While walking around Expo in March 2025, I wondered if the “protein in everything” trend was getting out of hand. One year later, the same show proved me right—protein is out of hand. At Expo, we saw (buckle up):

• Protein coffee, protein shakes, protein crispy rice treats, protein noodles, egg white protein chips, protein water (!), protein granola, protein rice, protein coffee milk (??), protein milk-milk (?!), protein cookies, protein bread, protein waffles, protein pancakes, protein pretzels, protein ice cream, protein bagels, protein cereal, protein candy, protein mac & cheese, protein crackers, and protein pasta sauce.

I’m certain I missed a few, and the word “protein” doesn’t even look like a word at this point. But unlike other diet trends, protein isn’t going away anytime soon.

Main character energy

Why is protein still the hottest bombshell in the villa? First and foremost, protein is the only macronutrient that has yet to be demonized. Dietary fat was the villain in the 80s and 90s. When that shifted in the early 2000s, carbs became your new arch nemesis. (Carbs were really the enemy in the mid-2010s, when keto demanded you eat zero while stuffing yourself with fat.) But nobody ever accused protein of making you gain weight. In many people’s eyes, protein is the only “safe” macro left to consume (besides fiber, which I’ll talk about in another article).

GLP-1 use is also a primary driver of the protein trend. GLP-1s are still on the rise. Due to concerns of weight loss reducing lean muscle mass, recommendations for people on these medications always reference protein consumption. GLP-1s also reduce your appetite, so those on the medication need to prioritize protein density. (Density = more protein relative to calories or volume.)

In fact, anyone looking to lose weight—whether or not you’re on a GLP-1—is being steered towards a higher-protein diet. Protein isn’t as calorie-dense as fat, and is a primary driver of satiety (fullness). Protein also helps to slow digestion, keeps blood sugar more stable, and can help preserve muscle mass while in a caloric deficit.

Protein fanfare is also being driven by the increase in menopause-related content and education. We’re talking about menopause far more freely now, and these conversations have given rise to a new and ever-growing sub-culture of wellness. Prioritizing protein during this stage (combined with weight training) can ward off loss of lean muscle and bone mass. Protein is also mentioned in every article about preventing menopause-related weight gain. (That alone would fuel protein’s popularity.)

Bucking the trend

Here’s where things get interesting. Usually with a trend like this, we see the following pattern:

• Small, nimble CPG brands create and validate a trend.

• Consumers adopt it early because it feels new, different, and value-aligned.

• Once the market is proven, legacy CPG (like Nestlé, General Mills, or Kellogg’s) enter the chat.

• By the time they pivot, innovate, and scale, the cultural moment has already sailed by (or is on its way out).

Keto is a great example of this: Quest/Perfect Keto/Bulletproof started the trend, and took it mainstream. By the time legacy CPG like SlimFast and Nestlé launched their “keto-friendly” lines, consumers were already moving away from keto (especially ultra-processed keto foods).

Protein, though, is going to be different. I’ll admit, when I saw Nestlé launch its line of GLP-1 friendly frozen meals in late 2024, I thought, “This is the beginning of the end of the high-protein craze.” It wasn’t, and it’s not going to be. As long as people continue to seek treatment with GLP-1s and keep the menopause conversation front and center, high protein offerings are going to continue to reign supreme. (The effect has already trickled down to consumers who aren’t menopausal or on a GLP-1, but now believe they, too, should be seeking out protein.)

Aside: Some legacy brands are missing the mark—but I’m not sure you’d notice. General Mills launched Protein Cheerios in December 2024, but when it launched, the cereal itself only contains 7g per serving, compared to 3g per serving for the original Cheerios. (I don’t consider 7g per serving “high protein” by any means.) In addition, much of that protein “increase” was due to increasing the serving size. The original Protein Cheerios also contain 12x (!) the added sugar content, compared to the original. (That’s not a typo). The average consumer won’t catch these nuances, and may gravitate to this version simply because it’s marketed as “high protein.” These kinds of marketing games aren’t making anyone healthier.

When it comes to protein, here’s what we will see in 2026-2027:

• Consumers getting burned out of high-protein everything. Much like the keto trend, people are going to start to ask, “Do we need protein in this?” or “Are these ultra-processed foods where I want to get my protein from?” (This will take at least a year to really start to show.)

• Some legacy brands who have expanded their product lines to include trendy high-protein offerings are going to quietly retire them, once people realize they don’t need protein in their popcorn or sweet treats.

• Consumers will start seeking more whole food-based sources of protein, or at least less heavily processed versions. Again, this may take another year. (See specifics below.)

• Some UPFs are going to stick. People will continue to eat David bars because they’re low-fat, low-calorie, and high-protein (despite the ingredients or the taste). Same with processed protein shakes, especially as they’re easy to digest (a benefit for GLP-1 users).

Where we’ll be getting our protein

Dairy is going to reign supreme in 2026-2027. (We can thank MAHA for this, at least in part. Happily, raw milk is not trending anywhere except your local urgent care clinic.) Dairy delivers high-protein in a familiar, accessible format. Primal Kitchen launched a grass-fed, dairy-based line at Expo. Cottage cheese is a social media darling—which tracks, given its protein density. Yogurt sales are on the rise, linked strongly to GLP-1 use. However, the dairy train is not limited to minimally-processed foods like unsweetened Greek yogurt—it also includes Chobani’s (and other brands’) low-fat, moderately-processed, alternatively-sweetened high-protein drinks and yogurts.

Meat sticks also sit perfectly at the intersection of protein + whole food. Jack Link’s (which I’d consider a legacy brand) even debuted a no-added-sugar version of their meat sticks at Expo, as a play to compete with new-kids-on-the-block-turned-CPG-giants Chomps and The New Primal.

Protein bars aren’t going anywhere either, although the camps are certainly split. There’s the ultra-processed David bar, which puts macros first, ingredients… (shrug), and taste dead last. You’ve got RXBAR, with an ultra-short, whole food ingredient list and nature-inspired flavors, but significantly less protein. In the middle, you’ve got the DAILY BAR, which is more processed than RXBAR, has a much “cleaner” ingredient list than David, includes plenty of protein… and flavors inspired by a peanut butter cup. There is room for all three.

Finally, lean proteins (like chicken or ground turkey) will remain bestsellers, and I’m just waiting for the GLP-1 crowd to discover tofu? Protein powder and shakes are also going to stay prevalent, as they’re both protein-packed and easy to digest. Protein in snack-sized packages is also on the rise, as GLP-1 users (and busy people in general) look for smaller, more frequent meals. And if the product has both protein and fiber? Chef’s kiss, that’s the dream—and is already driving the next wave of CPG innovation.

Microtrend: Protein + functional ingredients

I fully expected to see lots of “functional” ingredients on the floor, because every year, it’s something new. A few years ago, there was CBD in everything. Two years ago, it was probiotics in everything. This year (as with last), mushrooms were everywhere, with a big focus in the protein category. There were meat + mushroom blends, mushroom-only protein alternatives (sometimes with added pea protein), and functional mushrooms (like lion’s mane, reishi, and chaga) in much of it.

Interestingly, I expected to see far more creatine on the floor, specifically combined with high-protein foods. Kreatures of Habit launched their DAILY BAR four months ago, with 20 grams of protein, 9-10 grams of fiber, and 3 grams of creatine monohydrate (a legitimately functional dose). I’m never without one these days—and I figured given all the hype around creatine, menopause, and brain health, I’d see a lot more copycats. I did not! I saw plenty of creatine gummies, but there are serious problems with those, and I would never waste my money.

There was just one other creatine + protein bar on the floor, but the protein quality was low, the additives made me skeptical, the use of tallow was a 🤮 from me, and one of the reviews said, “Horrible texture, gives you the runs.” Enough said. Kreatures of Habit is obviously ahead of their time, but I suspect we’ll see more of these creatine + protein bars pop up next year.

Microtrend: Clear protein

Clear protein was also trending at the show, although this isn’t new. So what the hell is clear protein, and is it any better than opaque (???) protein?

Clear protein is just another version of whey, a protein found in dairy. Specifically, it’s a highly-processed whey isolate* mixed with water. (Whey isolate means it’s been processed to remove the milk fats, carbs and lactose.) Clear protein powder can be mixed with liquids (including water) and remains clear and thin, rather than the thicker, milky, chalky texture of traditional whey protein powder.

Clear protein doesn’t offer nutritional benefits beyond whey protein isolate. Both contain the same amount of protein (about 20 grams per serving), and both are virtually free of carbohydrates or fat. The texture and flavor of clear protein, however, may prove more palatable or versatile. Plus, it looks cool.

*Clear protein can also be made from whey protein hydrolysate, a form which is broken down into pre-digested amino acids. However, the versions I saw at Expo were predominantly the isolate form.

Protein tips for the average person

Should you be eating more protein? IDKID (I don’t know, it depends). If you think so, you can see how I eat 120 grams a day, and how I define a “high protein” food. Here’s what I will say, however:

Many consumers will gravitate towards “high protein” marketing and not dig any deeper, which could be problematic. Label-reading is a skill, and label and nutrition literacy is even more challenging. As with the Cheerios example, you may be making a purchase without understanding the true nutritional impact of the food.

Still, more people are label-reading these days, and if you’re reading this, I assume you certainly are. So please look beyond protein grams per serving. I’d also want you to compare that to the serving size, total calories, and other factors, like added sugar. (That “30 grams of protein” ice cream is for the whole pint, not one serving.)

Price is also a factor in this economy. Protein bars and pre-made shakes are convenient, but also comparatively expensive. You can’t go wrong with higher-protein whole foods, like chicken, shrimp, ground turkey, lean beef, egg whites, or tofu.

Also, taste matters. If you’re really focused on hitting your “protein goal,” you may be willing sacrifice taste or even ingredients for macros, to some degree. Just ask yourself, “Is this sustainable? Is this serving the bigger goal—to be healthy and happy?”

Do you have questions about protein, thoughts on the trend, or predictions of your own? Is there a topic you’d love me to tackle from an operator’s perspective? Leave a comment!

XO, MU

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This is my weekly series for subscribers only, where I’ll share things that caught my eye this week in a fun and flirty way (kiss), a sustainable way (marry), or a not-so-good way (kill). And yes, this trendy game is technically “f***, marry, or kill” but we run a family-friendly-ish show around here.

Kiss (things I like right now)

🎧 Wild Dark Shore, Charlotte McConaghy' (←listened with my ears)

I’m sure 92% of you have read this already, because everywhere I looked, I saw people raving about this book. But it was in Reese’s Book Club, and while I love her as an actress and business person, we don’t always have the same taste in books. Also, sometimes the more people say “you have to read this,” the less I want to read it? But it came up on Libby, so I gave in.

Dammit, Reese was right. This book is a masterpiece. I love books that hurt, and I haven’t read one in a while. Wild Dark Shore just broke me, in every way possible.

A woman washes up on the shore of a remote island just outside of the Antarctic. The family caretaking the island finds her. Who is she? How did she get here? Why is she here? The family, a father and three kids, have also been broken. Everyone is keeping secrets. Their lives begin to converge in ways that nobody (certainly not the reader) could have imagined.

It’s a bit of a thriller, but that word feels far too light and fluffy for this story. It’s a bit of a romance, but not in the traditional sense. It’s equal parts adventure and retreat; breakdown and resilience; destruction and rebirth. I can’t do it justice, but it will make you cry.

Of note, I was listening to this while reading Endurance. The similarities between both their settings and themes made listening to this even more impactful. Also, the multi-cast narration was glorious, and I only want to listen to Australian accents from here on out.

If you’re one of the 16 people who haven’t read (listened to) this yet, it’s time.

Listen to this, I beg you

Read more

Expo West is the largest natural and organics show in the world, featuring all of your favorite food, drink, personal care, and supplement brands. We walked the show for two days, talked to hundreds of people, and found protein in approximately 1,358 products. (Including Whole30 Approved LaCroix’s newest flavor, Pineapple Coconut!)

Here is my 2026 summary of the best finds. In next week’s XOMU email, I’ll do an even deeper dive into Expo’s biggest 2026 trend—the good, the weird, and the WTF are we even doing here. Don’t miss an email! Subscribe and they’ll go straight to your inbox.

Subscribe now

Expo West: Best finds (in order of my camera roll)

Roots Farm Fresh (fries and more)

We bumped into the Roots Farm Fresh truck within five minutes of setting foot on Expo grounds, and spent the next 30 minutes chatting with their co-founder (Alex) and team. Alex and I had the best conversation, bouncing between seed oils, whether tallow is here to stay (it’s not), tallow sourcing (ugh), and general industry trends.

I already loved their products (I buy them at my local Sprouts), but their new waffle fries really sealed the deal. They taste more potato-y than any other store-bought fries; crisp up deliciously in the air fryer; and have a creamy, fluffy center. They also make fries, potato “toasts” (wide, thin slices), and “croutons,” which are genius.

Ingredients (white potato fries): Organic Potatoes*, Organic Avocado Oil
*Upcycled

You’ll find Roots Farm Fresh new waffle fries at your local Sprouts and on their website in April. (So soon!) Sadly, their products are not Whole30 compatible; some varieties contain corn starch, but all varieties fall under the Pancake Rule. However, in your food freedom, you won’t find a tastier, more convenient fry. Follow Roots Farm Fresh on Instagram.

Geisen Sparkling Brut

This year at Expo, I learned that “dealcoholized” is a word. I also learned that I can, in fact, love non-alcoholic replicas of familiar alcoholic drinks like champagne. Geisen Sparkling Brut is crafted with the finest New Zealand grapes, and is "zero proof,” making it the perfect NA toasting beverage. And it tasted delicious! It’s not too sweet and deliciously crisp, with notes of citrus. It’s also pretty low in sugar, with just 7 grams per serving.

Ingredients: Dealcoholized Grape Wine (98%), Grape Juice (2%), Sulfur Dioxide (Preservative—does contain sulphites)

They share the details of how “dealcoholization” works on their website. Note, they guarantee their product contains no more than 0.5% alcohol by volume. By comparison, this is not meaningfully different from what you might get from certain fruit juices (like orange juice), so don’t let that figure throw you.

Geisen has other varietals too, including Sauv Blanc, Rosé, and a Merlot—all of which are NA. Is it still technically “wine?” They say yes, because they start with fermented grapes, like other wines. Is it Whole30 compatible, is the bigger question… and the answer is, “Maybe?” The word “wine” on the label is the tricky part, given the “no alcohol” rule, but there is no alcohol in final product, in which case I’d be fine with you drinking it during your Whole30. (I still need to talk about it with the team.)

In the meantime, if you’ve got a party, wedding, or regular old Tuesday night where you want to drink something fancy, these are a fantastic choice. Follow Geisen Wines on Instagram.

Joolies Date Sours

These aren’t available until May 2026 (I don’t want to bury the lede), but they were a delight and I cannot wait. To be clear, I am not a date fan; they’re sticky and too sweet. But when I saw sour dates? I was intrigued.

When I was pregnant (more than 13 years ago), I developed intense sour cravings. I started putting straight vinegar on all my salads, and would suck on lemons as much as my tooth enamel would allow. That sour fixation never left, and these new Joolies packed a serious punch. You’d only need one or two for maximum satisfaction, which means a little goes a long way.

Their web shop is down for maintenance, so I’m linking to the press release sharing more about this new offering. I also don’t have the full ingredient panel yet, although the press release says, “no added sugar or sugar alcohols.”

They’ll be available in four flavors: Blue Raspberry, Peachy, Watermelon (my favorite), and Cherry Cola. It was fun watching everyone’s face as they tried these—the sour cheeks were everywhere. Look for these in Sprouts in May, or find a retailer on the Joolies site. Follow Joolies on Instagram.

Tatemada Salsas

Tatemada’s branding is so pretty, and their salsas are next level. Their flavors are so rich and layered, with the perfect level of spice. (The Jalapeño was my favorite, and though that is marked as “max spice” on their label, I found it a solid medium.) We also loved the Molcajete; in fact, I’m eating that right now as I whip up this newsletter.

Ingredients: Roma Tomatoes, Jalapeño & Serrano Peppers, Onions, Pink Himalayan Salt, Non-GMO Fruit Derived Citric Acid

I was delighted to find a good selection at my local Sprouts; you can use their store locator to find Tatemada near you. I also had a fabulous chat with the founder, Sarah. And the best news ever—Tatemada Salsas are Whole30 compatible! I’d love to make them a Whole30 Approved partner, so if you love their salsas too, let them know on Instagram!

Once Upon a Coconut Water

I am not a coconut water fan. Never have been. It’s always tasted manky to me, which is not a word, but slang to describe something that’s dirty, old, and/or funky. While coconut water is fantastic source of energy and potassium, I’ve never found a brand I liked enough to buy—until Expo West, and Once Upon a Coconut!

Once Upon a Coconut uses fresh, never-from-concentrate, young coconuts harvested directly from the tree before they have time to age and drop. The taste is clean, lightly (naturally) sweet, and unlike any coconut water I’ve tried before. Their flavors, like Pineapple, Watermelon, and Blueberry, are delicious, with no added sugar. (All of these, plus the Original, are Whole30 compatible!)

Ingredients: Coconut water, watermelon juice

They also have two fun varieties: A chocolate coconut milk (sweetened), and sparkling coconut water with caffeine (also sweetened). I thought chocolate coconut milk would be gross, but I loved it. This would make the perfect post-workout carb replenishment, and I’m excited to order some for my kid for after his sporting events. They’re at my local Sprouts and Whole Foods; use their store locator to find Once Upon a Coconut near you. Follow Once Upon a Coconut on Instagram.

Veggie Vice Veggie Chips

Who isn’t going to stop when someone in a broccoli hat offers you a veggie chip? Veggie Vice takes the good green stuff (namely, Broccoli and Zucchini) and turns them into insanely crispy, highly addictive snack chips. They’ve currently got freeze-dried Broccoli Sour Cream and Onion chips, and Zucchini chips. The Broccoli chips use dairy, so they’re not Whole30 compatible, but damn were they delicious! I’m not the biggest broccoli fan, but I could easily eat a whole bag of these. The Zucchini Chips are Whole30 compatible, and they’d make a great addition to your next program!

Ingredients: Zucchini, Sea Salt.

I’m hoping they come out with more flavors, but I’ll happily trade off between broccoli and zucchini until they do. They’re available in my local Sprouts, but you can use their store locator to find them near you. Follow Veggie Vice on Instagram.

Expo West 2026 #1 Pick: Wilde Protein Crackers

Y’all, this was my hands-down favorite snack of the whole show, and it was even more delightful that it’s made by one of my favorite companies and founders (Jason Wright, pictured above). Wilde is famous for their high-protein chicken chips, which were so ahead of their time when they launched in 2015. (My son is obsessed with the Buffalo, and I love the Chicken & Waffle.) They’re chips made from real chicken, averaging between 10-12 grams of protein per serving. Wilde also makes mini-bags, perfect to send in your kid’s lunchbox (or your own).

This year, they debuted their newest product… Protein Crackers. At least, that’s what the package says. Y’all, they should be called High-Protein Fancy-Ass Cheez-Its, and let me tell you, I could not get enough. They’re delicious: crunchy, crispy, cheesy, and yes, packed with protein! But unlike so many other Expo products, protein has been baked into their brand ethos since the very beginning. This isn’t a chip adding protein—this is protein in the form of a chip.

They’re not out yet, and I’m desperately trying to find out when and where they will launch, so standby! Stalk Follow Wilde Chips on Instagram.

Expo West 2026 breakout star: Sourmilk

Sourmilk Yogurt made a big splash at Expo. It’s Greek yogurt, low in lactose, high in protein (of course), and insanely creamy. It boasts more probiotics than typical Greek yogurts, contains no added sugar, is made from organic grass-fed dairy, and has been called “the whipped cream of yogurt.” Also, their socials are a WILD RIDE.

The company is women-founded, from two best friends in New York who used to work in VC. I’ve already reached out to say, “If y’all ever do a raise, I’ll be first in line.” I think you’ll see Sourmilk in many retailers this time next year, fingers crossed.

Expo West: Honorable mentions

These were fabulous finds that are worth calling out—and worth you seeking out at your local grocer or online.

Little Lads Spicy Dill Pickle Popcorn

First, to my delight, the pickle-flavored-everything trend is still alive. Next, I’m a huge popcorn fan, but not the bagged stuff. I find it super-dry, lacking depth of flavor, or both. I tried plenty of popcorn at Expo, but walked away disappointed each time. Until Little Lads! This is good popcorn! It wasn’t dry, and the dill pickle flavor was delicious. I didn’t try all of their flavors, but I’m intrigued by Vermont Maple Buttah.

Siete Sourdough Tortillas

Siete never misses, and this Expo was no different. They debuted a new “Sourdough” Tortilla, and it was nothing short of magical. It’s made from cassava, but giving major sourdough vibes. The texture is soft and smooth like flour, the flavor has that mild sourdough tang, but they’re 100% gluten- and grain-free. They’re launching in Texas HEBs this month, with more nationwide retailers to follow in early spring. Follow Siete on Instagram.

Zingha Aromatherapy

Remember a few years ago, I introduced you to Boom Sticks? This year, Zingha also caught my attention. They’re essential oil nasal inhalers (aromatherapy) designed to improve your mood, relax you before bed, clear your sinuses, or relieve stress. (And you can get both nostrils at once, which I love!) I grabbed a sample of the Boost, which is Eucalyptus, Tea Tree, Rosemary, Sweet Orange, Lemon, and Peppermint. I’ve been using it daily; you can get 4 for $20 (and a variety of flavors/scents) on Amazon.

Gutzy Prebiotic Pouches

Thanks to (again) GLP-1 use, pouches, smoothies, and other easy-to-digest, nutrient-dense snacks or mini-meals are on the rise. I’ve been eating baby food pouches for years during travel or hikes, but Gutzy pouches are all grown up.

They launched two new protein-added varieties at Expo, featuring 7 grams of pea protein and a touch of monkfruit. All of their pouches (which they call “smoothies”) feature 7-8 grams of fiber per serving, and are packed with prebiotics. Plus, the five non-protein versions are all Whole30 compatible! These are such a fantastic addition to your mini-meal, snack, or on-the-go travel stash, as you can keep it out of the fridge for a whole day (as long as it’s not exposed to extreme heat). Use their store locator to find Gutzy near you, and follow them on Instagram.

Want to know more about anything I’ve shared here? Excited about any (or all) of these products? Leave a comment; they’re open to all today!

XO, MU

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This is my weekly series for subscribers only, where I’ll share things that caught my eye this week in a fun and flirty way (kiss), a sustainable way (marry), or a not-so-good way (kill). And yes, this trendy game is technically “f***, marry, or kill” but we run a family-friendly-ish show around here.

Kiss (things I like right now)

🎧 The Hunting Wives, May Cobb (←listened with my ears)

After all of my non-fiction survival/adventure reads (I’m currently on my third in a row) I needed a little ear candy, and The Hunting Wives did not disappoint, except for the places where it definitely was disappointing. Listen, sometimes you have to suspend all disbelief for a book to work. (See: The Family Game.) This one was no different, in that (a) the “sexy” stuff was actually tremendously problematic (not illegal but HELLO) and (b) the protagonist kept making dumb decision after dumber decision, to a degree that I actually kind of hated her. Her lustful urges overpowered any semblance of executive function at every potential opportunity (bitch, are you a 14-year-old boy?) but that didn’t stop me from waving my hands in the air like I just did not care! I believe this is now a Netflix show, which I will not be watching because I can’t be this annoyed all over again, but the book was nothing but candy, and I did enjoy it far more than I hated it. Say it with me: BEACH READ!

Enjoy these awful women

📖 The Half-Hearted Queen (Shattered King, Book 2) Charlie N. Holmberg (←read with my eyes)

The Shattered King made the Marry section of my Best of 2025 book list. I gave it 7 stars out of 5, and pre-ordered the sequel the moment I finished it. Then I had to wait six months for the release—and it was worth the wait, mostly. First, to be fair, I dove into this between my second and third non-fiction adventure/survival book. It’s hard to go from parasitic infections in the Amazon and clubbing baby seals while stranded in the Antarctic to “a fantasy romance where a country healer and a cursed king have to save the kingdom using magic and love.” It was a record scratch. And though I didn’t notice any of this in the first book, I found myself rolling my eyes in the second with the exhausting “will we, won’t we” star-crossed lovers storyline. (They both need therapy.) BUT I loved it, and the second story delivered in a completely satisfying way, right up through the end. (And yes, it was the end—this is a duology, and I was impressed with how well it completed the series without feeling rushed.)

The Part 2 we've been waiting for

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First, if you aren’t embarrassed, it’s not embarrassing. I live by this credo. As such, I have taken potentially very embarrassing scenarios and decided not to be embarrassed by them.

• A beaded hair extension slid out of my hair and floated to the floor right in front of a man at the gym. He looked horrified, probably assuming I had radiation poisoning.

• That time I moved out of the way on a plane, not realizing there was a little step up to the seats, and fell ass over teakettle into the row. Like, I FELL fell, all the way to the ground, and he had to help me up because of how awkward a position I was in. (Luckily nobody was sitting there yet.)

• Just last week, I forgot the term “memory consolidation” in a podcast interview with a longevity expert. When the words wouldn’t come, I said, “you know—brain stuff.” (If you hear that podcast once it comes out, please laugh along with me.)

However, there are everyday actions I do find embarrassing, so I am very careful when I perform them. Objectively, there is nothing embarrassing about these things. Telling myself that does not help; I don’t make the rules.

1. Walking my dogs when a car is coming towards us

What if my dogs pull me towards the car? What if I trip walking? What if I drop the phone, coffee, or poop bag I am holding? Am I walking okay? (Like, in a straight line, with a normal gait, and good posture?) If a car comes up behind us, I do not care. This is only when the car it coming towards us. Once I dropped both pup cups in the street right in front of a man walking his dog towards us. This was not embarrassing, Had he been in a car, I would have been mortified.

2. Pulling into an automatic car wash

It’s positively diabolical to make me fit my left front tire into your tiny little track. If you really wanted me to nail this, you would have made the approach straight on. Instead, you force my SUV into the tightest possible corner, then immediately expect me to straighten out the wheel while fitting my tire into a guide that has very little clearance. I JUST KNOW the teenage attendant is judging me as he points his finger to the left or right. I pretend I can’t see him once I’m in neutral. I know he can see me.

3. Picking up my dog’s poop

Everybody’s dog poops. Everybody picks up their dog’s poop, because we are good citizens. But if I ever pass someone picking up their dog’s poop, I avert my eyes. It feels too intimate. I would appreciate the same courtesy, especially if I’m trying to balance a tray with an iced decaf and two pup cups while picking up said poop, and you’re in a car coming towards us. (We’ve established this.)

4. Reading a card while the person watches you read it

I don’t care if it’s three words, I would like to read this card in private. This is especially true if it’s a long handwritten message. My face cannot maintain a delighted expression for this long. What if I start to smile, but the message is more serious and I have to fix my face halfway through? I am going to start saying, “I will read this with my back to you, it’s more meaningful that way.” They will be too confused to argue. My son is the only exception, because he is the exception to basically everything.

5. Walking up stairs at the gym

My balance isn’t always great, especially when I’m tired or my concussion symptoms flare. Will holding the banister make me look elderly? Should I be walking up the stairs faster? We are at the gym. Maybe I should be jogging? I could also take them two at a time, because they’re not very tall. But that might look unnecessarily aggressive. Damn it, someone just beat me to the stairs. Now I need to walk very slowly because otherwise I’m looking at their butt. But is someone behind me? I’m definitely holding the banister.

6. Sneezing in public

I recognize sneezing is an involuntary physical reaction, but I will do whatever I can to hide it. If I can suppress it, I will, even if it looks like I’ve had a tiny seizure. Sometimes that doesn’t work, and then it comes out so strangely it draws even more attention, and nobody knows whether to say “bless you” or not. If I have to sneeze-sneeze, I’m horrified. I want to stand up and yell, “I’m NOT SICK someone’s perfume is just VERY INTENSE.” Thank god I’m not a multiple sneezer, I might not ever leave the house.

7. Someone stopping by without calling

Unless my home is immaculate (right down to the dog treat cabinet) and I am dressed for a keynote speaking event, please do not just “stop by.” This happens often, however, because my husband’s friends are always borrowing or returning camera equipment. I try to hide but he always says, “Babe, come meet Matt,” and then I have to accept the fact that his friend thinks I am a “before” in What Not to Wear and my house has been recently robbed, because why else would it look like this? The only upside is that when I see this friend again during a night out or an event, he is stunned by how attractive I actually am (by comparison). Maybe this one isn’t so bad.

8. Using the big shopping cart

I am just one person shopping, therefore I need the half-size cart. If I have a big cart, I’m certain it looks like overkill. Why is she planning to buy so much food? What kind of foods take up that much space? Not vegetables. Those are small. Is it toilet paper? Toilet paper is SO bulky. How much is this person sh*tting? Also, how am I going to fit this cart down the aisles with other big carts? There will have to be these awkward “I’m going to squeeze through,” then I can’t squeeze through, then our carts get stuck together. Smaller carts are like the Porsches of shopping carriages. And even if my small cart is piled to eye-level, it’s still holding less than a half-full big cart. We don’t need to test this theory.

9. Using a shopping cart with a bum wheel

I always test the carts, but sometimes the squeak, shake, or noise doesn’t show up right away. Everyone is looking at me. I can’t even pick the right cart. This was the worst at Target, because I’m already buying shit you know I don’t need. I want to apologize to everyone I pass, even though it’s the store’s responsibility to ensure their cart wheels are aligned and well-greased. This is why I like Trader Joe’s. The only cart is the kid-sized, which I am clearly too tall for (even though it’s the perfect size), so I use my reusable shopping totes to carry my purchases.

10. Jogging/running in normal clothes

I ran an errand not far from my house last week. I had to cross a very busy multi-lane road to get home. There is a crosswalk, but it was a block out of my way. I decided to wait for a break in traffic and walk. I saw the break, started to cross, then noticed another car had pulled into the street. I had to jog to make it safely. I was wearing jeans and sneakers, but I was carrying a purse. I would do anything to not run with a purse. If I’m jogging in street clothes, I want to look athletic. I am a runner. I want you, in the car, to know that jogging across this road feels effortless for me. You cannot be athletic with an oversized navy suede purse. I should have used the crosslight.

What am I missing?

Are there things not on my list that you find terribly embarrassing? Please share so we can either feel better that I’m comfortable with that, or add yet another thing to our own lists.

XO, MU

This is my weekly series for subscribers only, where I’ll share things that caught my eye this week in a fun and flirty way (kiss), a sustainable way (marry), or a not-so-good way (kill). And yes, this trendy game is technically “f***, marry, or kill” but we run a family-friendly-ish show around here.

Kiss (things I like right now)

📖 Endurance: Shackleton’s Incredible Voyage, Alfred Lansing (←read with my eyes)

This book was written in 1959, and is still considered the definitive account of Sir Ernest Shackleton’s ill-fated 1914 expedition to the Antarctic. I have never been so on the edge of my seat. Also, I would never have believed this tale was real, had I not read about Lansing’s meticulous research. (He interviewed many of the surviving crew members, and used their personal diaries to piece together the full account.)

In 1914, Shackleton (an accomplished Antarctic explorer) led a party of 28 men, with a goal of being the first to cross the content of Antarctica. Their ship became stuck in ice floes (and eventually crushed) in the Weddell Sea—about 300 miles off the coast of Antartica, and described as “the most treacherous and dismal region on Earth.”

The book spans the next two years (!) as Shackleton and his men desperately try to survive in the most inhospitable environment you could imagine. I won’t share more, because I need you to read this book for yourself.

I have read some unbelievable tales of adventure and survival: Into Thin Air and Unbroken are two of my favorites. But Endurance tops them all (or at the very least, ties with Krakauer). This has sent me on a trek for more non-fiction historical adventure books; I’ve got at least three in my TBR pile as we speak. (Also, my fiction audiobook is vibing with my non-fiction read again this week! Standby for that review.)

READ THIS I ORDER YOU

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