The carts at Target are the worst. We went back for a different one when the first one sounded like a 10-piece percussion ensemble performing for the first time.
The small cart is the better cart! I live alone. I do not ever need a big carts worth of groceries. And yet I got in an argument with the cart wrangler at my store because he insisted the small carts were only for the elderly and disabled. Says who, my dude??
Love this! Not an embarrassment (though I have plenty) but want to say I love LMNT but I REALLLLYYYY wish they would bring back the lemon habanero flavor. The sweet and spicy combo was the best. 😭
The only time I feel super self-conscious is when I have a zit on my chin. I’m 51 FFS, and recently adding in low dose testosterone has caused a flare up of cystic acne. I feel like these zits are the size of dinner plates! Ugh!
I have fallen up stairs, down stairs, just regularly walking around so many times that I am like a short, round Jennifer Lawrence without the Oscar. My first instinct is always to laugh (unfortunately that applies to myself AND other people), but I have literally rolled over on a bicycle in Cape May down a sidewalk in front of a crowded bed and breakfast front porch and lived to tell the tale.
The car wash is more annoying than embarrassing. You’d think technology would have upgraded on that front by now…
The car wash is a night mare for me. I finally found one where you get out of your car and they drive it through for you. I’m a long time reader but really enjoyed this issue. Thank you!
First of all the car wash wheel game is ridiculous because why am I defying physics for a clean-ish car? (It's pollen season here) I always want to get out of the car and be like you do it I will meet you on the other side - thank youuuuu.
Also, texting typos. Listen I have been texting a long long long time (T9 anyone) but how dare my phone just change words I know I spelled right ENOUGH to be auto-corrected correctly?!?! I always have to edit or send that little *Correct Word text afterwards.
Can you imagine someone standing by the wash like “slip me a 5 and I’ll bring it through for you?” I feel like that is a legitimate side-hustle 😂
I just decided years ago that I don’t need to correct typos. You know I know grammar and spelling. You can figure it out 99% of the time. Life is short. No ragrets.
When someone is in the car with me I cannot backup park in a straight line to save my life. Yet, by myself I can back up my pickup truck ball exactly to the horse trailer hitch and attach them perfectly every single time.
Yes! This is x100 in yoga class- I am NAILING a balance but if the teacher walks by there is a very high probability I will fall. Possibly upon them. I swear they’ve started bracing in said scenarios 🤣
I get embarrassed by how long I wash my hands in public bathrooms. Other people go from dry to wet to soapy to wet to dry in under 10 seconds, and I’m still sitting there in my first wetting phase. When I go through the soap process I look like I’m preparing to perform surgery. If it’s a single bathroom and there’s a line, I’m 110% sure I’m being judged for how long the delay is from flushing to opening the door. Do they know I’m just washing my hands thoroughly or do they think I’m trying to take a bath in the sink?
I promise that I am judging someone way more if you wash your hands for all of five seconds then anyone is judging me for washing them as thoroughly as I do. If I saw you in a bathroom, I would appreciate your conscientiousness 👏
Good list! When I see people picking up their dog poop, I talk to their dog: “You did your job! What a good dog!“
The carts at Target are the worst. We went back for a different one when the first one sounded like a 10-piece percussion ensemble performing for the first time.
the way I cackled at the office over these. Well played, MU.
The small cart is the better cart! I live alone. I do not ever need a big carts worth of groceries. And yet I got in an argument with the cart wrangler at my store because he insisted the small carts were only for the elderly and disabled. Says who, my dude??
Love this! Not an embarrassment (though I have plenty) but want to say I love LMNT but I REALLLLYYYY wish they would bring back the lemon habanero flavor. The sweet and spicy combo was the best. 😭
Oh I love this list and the car wash tire experience is wild! Thank you for making us all feel seen and included in our thoughts!❤️
Also, I love your expression in this week’s header! 😂😂😂
The only time I feel super self-conscious is when I have a zit on my chin. I’m 51 FFS, and recently adding in low dose testosterone has caused a flare up of cystic acne. I feel like these zits are the size of dinner plates! Ugh!
I have fallen up stairs, down stairs, just regularly walking around so many times that I am like a short, round Jennifer Lawrence without the Oscar. My first instinct is always to laugh (unfortunately that applies to myself AND other people), but I have literally rolled over on a bicycle in Cape May down a sidewalk in front of a crowded bed and breakfast front porch and lived to tell the tale.
The car wash is more annoying than embarrassing. You’d think technology would have upgraded on that front by now…
The car wash is a night mare for me. I finally found one where you get out of your car and they drive it through for you. I’m a long time reader but really enjoyed this issue. Thank you!
Thank you for a good, long, and genuine laugh. Your descriptions are top tier. 👏🏼
Oh my goodness...the car wash!! I hate it because I know the guy at the switch thinks I'm an old lady that can't drive!!!
So good! I’m sick today and this cheered me right up 😁
Oh no! Feel better, but so glad this helped ❤️
First of all the car wash wheel game is ridiculous because why am I defying physics for a clean-ish car? (It's pollen season here) I always want to get out of the car and be like you do it I will meet you on the other side - thank youuuuu.
Also, texting typos. Listen I have been texting a long long long time (T9 anyone) but how dare my phone just change words I know I spelled right ENOUGH to be auto-corrected correctly?!?! I always have to edit or send that little *Correct Word text afterwards.
Can you imagine someone standing by the wash like “slip me a 5 and I’ll bring it through for you?” I feel like that is a legitimate side-hustle 😂
I just decided years ago that I don’t need to correct typos. You know I know grammar and spelling. You can figure it out 99% of the time. Life is short. No ragrets.
I mean if you had a Venmo account we can work something out is all I’m saying. 😂😂😂 Someone is missing out!!!
When someone is in the car with me I cannot backup park in a straight line to save my life. Yet, by myself I can back up my pickup truck ball exactly to the horse trailer hitch and attach them perfectly every single time.
I believe you! I do!
I can do a task (bouncing a ball, for example) correctly 100 times, but if I realize someone is watching I will *immediately* flub it.
Yes! This is x100 in yoga class- I am NAILING a balance but if the teacher walks by there is a very high probability I will fall. Possibly upon them. I swear they’ve started bracing in said scenarios 🤣
Oh god i can throw true spirals to my kid in the driveway all day but when someone drives by it goes 20 feet wide and wobbly 😂🙈
I get embarrassed by how long I wash my hands in public bathrooms. Other people go from dry to wet to soapy to wet to dry in under 10 seconds, and I’m still sitting there in my first wetting phase. When I go through the soap process I look like I’m preparing to perform surgery. If it’s a single bathroom and there’s a line, I’m 110% sure I’m being judged for how long the delay is from flushing to opening the door. Do they know I’m just washing my hands thoroughly or do they think I’m trying to take a bath in the sink?
I promise that I am judging someone way more if you wash your hands for all of five seconds then anyone is judging me for washing them as thoroughly as I do. If I saw you in a bathroom, I would appreciate your conscientiousness 👏
Thank you! I’m gonna think about making you proud next time I’m embarrassed 🥹