Kiss, Marry or Kill: 49
I am not a sociopath (but she is, and I can't get enough). Also, upgrade your coffee, one fashion trend I'm on, more "when I die" thoughts, and the cancer screening caveat everyone should know about
This is my weekly series for subscribers only, where I’ll share things that caught my eye this week in a fun and flirty way (kiss), a sustainable way (marry), or a not-so-good way (kill). And yes, this trendy game is technically “f***, marry, or kill” but we run a family-friendly-ish show around here.
Kiss (things I like right now)
Sociopath: A Memoir by Patric Gagne (←Audiobook)
I can count the non-fiction books I’ve listened to on one finger. (Born a Crime by Trevor Noah—that’s it.) But I love reading non-fiction, and The Psychopath Test by Jon Ronson was one of my all-time favorites. When Sociopath came up as available on Libby, I was intrigued. Like most people, I suspect, I’ve often wondered what it would mean to be a sociopath. To be honest, there have always been aspects of it that sound enviable, but maybe that’s just me? (It’s the same part of me that believes I’d thrive in prison, with structured routines and so much time to read and exercise, plus I wouldn’t have to talk to anybody if I didn’t want to.) I’ve also known a few people I’ve suspected of this condition. In general, I wanted to know more.
I looked for excuses to keep listening. (My house is very clean right now.) The author is obviously brilliant, and surprisingly self-aware. Maybe that’s a common misconception about sociopaths—that they don’t know they’re sociopaths—but from childhood, Patric knows she’s different, and begins a quest to figure out how, and why, and what it means for her life. Her learnings and applications are fascinating. I immediately liked her. Her delivery is painfully direct, which is my favorite form of communication. Emotions—at least, the more subtle ones, like empathy, guilt, or other people’s perceptions of her—never enter the chat, which is also relatable. (I’ve had to actively work on developing empathy. The difference is that I could, and have, expanded that emotional range.) As she learns, we learn, but her storytelling is also exceptional, so it reads more like fiction.
In the book, she explores “faux-ciopaths;” those who pretend to be, want to be, or simply want proximity to real sociopaths. I understand that fascination. Still, the book reveals its own lessons without having to fangirl your local sociopath. Could we apply some of the more helpful aspects of her personality disorder to our own lives? We could. Should we leave the least helpful aspects behind? Yes—and we probably couldn’t cultivate those anyway, because that’s not how we’re built. Though some days, I almost wish otherwise. (Not really, but also yes, really. Remember, prison.) This is a book I’ll be thinking about for a very long time, and I’ve had to resist DM’ing Patric because I would fangirl (although she would not care a lick?).
P.S. Of note, the author reads it herself, which is always dicey. However, Patric does a phenomenal job, 10/10, which many professional narrators cannot achieve. Kudos.
Vashon Island Coffee Dust
I don’t often get unsolicited packages. I discourage brands from just sending me stuff, and my practice is that I only accept samples from brands I’m considering working with, or potential/current Whole30 Approved partners. But last month, a mysterious package showed up at the office, with a little note. It basically said, “Love your stuff, wanted to send you a little treat, hoping this makes it into a Kiss, Marry, Kill.” I love me some good insider knowledge, and I was intrigued.
It’s called Coffee Dust. The sampler contains six little spice blends with no added sugar, which you add to your coffee, coffee alternative, or hot cocoa for a flavor boost. As an example, Hot Momma is a mix of cocoa, cayenne, cinnamon, and sea salt. Cocoa Calm is cocoa, lavender, and sea salt.
I’m no stranger to adding flavor to coffee; Chocolate Salt LMNT has been my ride-or-die. But after the packet I consume at the gym, I don’t always need more sodium. This is where Coffee Dust has come in. One tiny scoop (included in the sampler pack) packs so much flavor. Hot Momma is my favorite, but I’ve now tried them all, and they are all delicious in their own way. Each tiny tin contains 12 servings, so a sampler pack can last you quite a while. I’ve added them to my decaf coffee and my MUD\WTR, and it’s equally good in both.
With no added sugar and the shortest ingredient list, this is such a fun and easy way to spice up your beverages. (It also makes a great host gift, if you know the person is a coffee lover.) Could you make this yourself? Probably, with a few additions to your spice cabinet. Am I going to do that every morning? Hell no. I don’t add these every time I make a mug, but a few times a week I’m picking-me-up with a scoop.
This is not sponsored, nor do I grant a mention to everyone who sends me free stuff. This product just happened to be a home run, and I’ve been using it consistently all month. In fact, they should become Whole30 Approved! The community would love this in addition to their nutpods. (I’ll reach out to the brand and share my thanks in person too.)